Saturday, March 11, 2017

Jana on Singlehood and Service


Livy from Crown of Beauty Magazine just sent us the link to a preview of her upcoming issue, which includes interviews with Jana Duggar, Jill Duggar Dillard, Jessa Duggar Seewald, Jinger Duggar Vuolo, and Joy-Anna Duggar (soon to be Joy-Anna Duggar Forsyth).

In the preview, Jana shares that she and her family visit their local veteran's home every Sunday to share music and a sermon. "It’s been such a blessing getting to know each of the men and women there who have helped serve in our military and exciting to hear their stories!" the second oldest Duggar child tells Crown of Beauty.

Jana gives words of encouragement to "those of you still at home," reminding them that there are ministry opportunities everywhere, even within the walls of one's house. "Wherever God has you now, just be faithful to reach out, encourage and serve those around you," she says.

Jana also explains how it feels to be single while her other siblings are getting married and moving out. "Waiting is not always easy," she tells Crown of Beauty. "Especially in those times when all the married siblings are getting together and you can’t go along because you're not part of 'that' group. But waiting doesn’t mean sitting and literally waiting. No, we need to be busy with where God has us...being content and joyfully serving Jesus there." Jana finds encouragement on difficult days by reaching out to encourage other people.

To read the full preview, visit the Crown of Beauty Magazine website. We will give you a heads up when the issue featuring the interviews with the five eldest Duggar daughters is available.


If you enjoy this blog, check out our other blogs (NashvilleWife.com and BatesFamilyBlog.com).

Photo courtesy TLC

189 comments:

  1. I don't understand why she "can't go along" with her married siblings. Who else would be perfect chaperones for her but those double sets of experienced eyes? Why couldn't she enjoy some social time with her married brother and sisters and their spouses?! Who set these crazy rules for her?? And even more puzzling, why does she, at her very adult age, have to follow them??? This article doesn't give me reassurance that she's OK, it makes me more worried that she is "trapped" at home!

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    1. Why would you need to chaperone married couples?

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    2. I think you missed the whole point of the interview. Obviously she views her life as full, but waiting. You seem to just be in a pity party for her. .or you. Go out and serve Jesus with all your heart.

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    3. She doesn't say that they always do things as couples excluding singles but there are times when that happens it's just the natural progression of life which is exactly what she talks about. She is obviously extraordinarily capable and could live alone but I don't know why someone would want to waste the money when they know they have the ability to be alone but the option to save money by living with family. Sounds pretty savvy to me...

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    4. Maybe she just means that she feels uncomfortable, like a fifth wheel. She never said she's "not allowed".

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    5. The way i am thinking She feels like the 5th wheel. When couples are together like a "date night" how would you feel if everyone else but you had no one.

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    6. I think what she was trying to say that her siblings go on things like double dates, and she can join because she is not a part of a couple.

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    7. I think what she's trying to say is that she is left out. Many single women feel like this when their friends and family start getting married and hanging out.

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    8. Even if she feels like the 5th wheel, where did she get the notion that it's a bad thing not to be part of a pair when everyone else is? Must be family social pressure to feel like that and feel as if you are excluded. Why aren't the others making her feel welcome?

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    9. What happens to women that get dumped from relationships, widowed, never marry, etc? Being in that category is tough. Now how do all of them function? Internally too, self esteem is vital.

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    10. I am sure they don't understand the way the secular world lives their lives.Because, it feels right to them, since IT is the way they were raised and the way they choose to live now that they are adults.

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    11. I'm sure she didn't mean that she's not allowed to go but that it would be awkward. Why are people always trying to put her in this "trapped" category? She's a lovely young lady and when or if it's her time to marry she will be a wonderful wife. Good grief, people complain about the girls being too young to marry and then complain or "show concern" if they're too old and "should be out enjoying life " whatever, I love this girl and her Biblical world view. I say, YOU GO GIRL! I hope my daughter turns out just like these ladies!

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    12. I'm sure she goes out. Just when the married couples go out she doesn't feel like tagging along. I would also feel awkward,who wouldn't?

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    13. Everyone is ready to pounce on anyone with morals these days. She is entitled to have her own feelings. I am proud of the way she carries herself it is a good example to young ladies. People need to stop speculating about every statement made by them.

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    14. every body should just leave jana be she,s has a good head on the shoulders being highly smart staying as single person. why what,s the rush in getting married so darn young and not having a real career job set goals in the 1st place before any marriage and having childern too young which highly foolish when not really realy mentally. this is a real fact

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    15. As a single woman in her late 20s in the secular world, I still can relate to Jana's words on feeling a little left out when everyone is pairing off.

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    16. It's up to her siblings to make her feel inclusive. I always tell my kids (two are in relationships, one is not) to always make everyone feel welcome and comfortable, whether family member or friend. Be sure to include everyone, and leave no one out. And they are good at that. You have to practice that. My husband and I have one person with us many times, and we make sure that that person is comfortable, and they have the attention from both of us. We're not off in the corner smooching while they're sitting there lost! You would think in a Christ-centered household, that they would be able to provide fellowship to all, regardless of whether they are married or not.

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    17. It's not right that her married siblings exclude her for "couples" activities. As a single woman with mostly married friends, my social life would be almost a zero but for the kindness of my married friends who include me. My opinion.

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    18. I agree she didn't mean that she's not allowed. I was the first of my friends to have kids and many of them hung out without us not to purposely leave me and my husband out, but we simply can't do a lot of dinners out or other activities in the evening with the kids. Occasionally yes but there were still many times we couldn't. I wouldn't trade a thing though :)

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  2. This blog is really trying to sell Jana lately. It's so sad that Jana's personal life is so public. I feel sorry not that she is still single but that being single draws so much attention and pity.

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    1. Really? Not sure what you're referring to. If anything, it's commenters always saying "poor Jana."

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    2. You bring up a very good point. A single Christian woman can live a very fulfilling life. It's just frowned upon by our society because it views marriage as the ultimate goal.

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    3. Folks have been asking for more information on Jana for so long. I believe it's a welcomed addition.

      I admire this family for following God's call to remain in public ministry despite the constant attacks and scrutiny.

      It has got to be painful and frustrating to continuously answer uncomfortable questions.


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    4. True, commenters are frequently saying "poor Jana". I don't think she sees it that way. She is waiting for God's best for her, and not settling just to be married. I believe God has a great plan for her.

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    5. "Sell Jana?" There's nothing to "sell." The viewers love her and want to hear about her. Weird comment.

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  3. I don't understand, why can't she go along when the married couples get together? I know it can be a bit awkward to be the only single one, but surely no one leaves her out? Besides, there are other singles in their family to go, too, like John David and Josiah. I don't know, that statement strikes me as so strange. I've been the single one in company of a lot of couples, and I never had a problem.

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    1. Especially since before marriage the Duggars always emphasizef getting to know the whole family so why could Jana and the single siblings not tag along with the married siblings once in a while... or for that matter any combination of the family... I mean maby Derick and Ben & Jessa and Jana and Joy enjoy to go horse riding so they go horse riding together or whatever reason you go with a certain group of people...

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    2. Laura, while that may be true of the couples you know (and they sound very nice and inclusive), sometimes young/immature couples are "proud in their couple-ness" (for lack of a better term) and like to socialize somewhat exclusively with other couples. Sometimes it's just immaturity, sometimes not. It's like they feel they've achieved the ultimate in adulthood by getting married, like they are more grown up than others who are single. My spouse & I have known couples like that...they are actually the least emotionally mature. It's my hope that Jana's comment is a wake up call to couples everywhere- Exclusivity is quite rude. Frankly, having been a long time Duggar watcher/reader, Jana is by far the only one marriage material in my opinion. She's got a very good head on her shoulders, a genuine sweetness (sincerely nice), both emotional and spiritual maturity, she doesn't need to be the belle of the ball or boss people around, she's intelligent with a great work ethic, and consistently makes sound choices. The husband she chooses will indeed be blessed by having found such a wife.

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    3. @ 4:17, your explanation is very insightful about pride in being a couple. I agree, that shows immaturity and I would add that it shows a lack of self love for the person as an individual.

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  4. If the Duggars like veterans so much, why don't their sons enter military service? They'll go to ALERT, but they don't serve their country.

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    1. You just heard that a certain famiy goes every week to comfort a group of very lonely people who have been largely forgotten by society. Instead of commending them, you find something to criticize. Why? There are many ways to serve, and I'd say that a nursing home ministry is one of the best.

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    2. I've wondered that about the military. Wonder what would happen if one of their sons ever got drafted? Would they object on religious grounds? And then continue to use guns anyway?

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    3. Out of all those kids, you'd think there would be one who could serve.

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    4. I think the Duggar's choose to serve by hlding a spot in public office, serving as first responders, I believe John David is a volunteer fire fighter, and they serve in other capacities. I don't think "serving" is exclusive to the military. Although who knows - still lots of kids to go!

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    5. Perhaps that's not what God has planned for them.

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    6. 4:27 you say "....out of all those kids you'd think there could be one who could serve". I've heard that said many times about many, many families! Most notable families that come to mind? How about our Commander in Chiefs kids? Plenty of Trumps, no military backgrounds! I remember when Mitt Romney ran for prez. With 6 sons, people asked why no Romney's in the millitary? So this question is nothing new! I think its worse on polititions because they claim they "want to serve their country", yet so many have no military service! I guess they mean serve their country only if it is for monetary gain!

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    7. Jeanne, yes, that is serving, but with a family that big, you'd think at least one of the sons would serve by joining the military. I mean, my mom's family was not even half as large as the Duggars ("only" 9 children total), but two of them served. It's odd that of the 11 adults, none of them have enlisted.

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    8. Probably because being in the military would force them to be exposed to many things they try to stay away from. So they choose to serve as first responders.

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    9. Our sons and brothers and fathers and grandfathers and... didn't turn away from military service because it would "expose" them to "many things they try to stay away from"! Thank goodness they were brave enough to face anything and everything, to keep us free and safe!!!

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    10. Well, there are lots of ways to serve your country besides being in the military. I'm sure if God called one of them to be in the military, they'd do it.

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    11. Perhaps the Duggars would be considered Conscientious Objectors, if a draft were ever to be instituted again, and it is against their religious beliefs to serve in the military.

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  5. I like Jana's attitude. I do hope that her married siblings include her a lot of the time, though--they are still peers, even with different marital statuses.

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    1. I agree, Amy. I think they all do get together. These are her siblings and I know she likes her in-laws...they are friends. I think it is just special couples events...and maybe not all the couples at that. Maybe just a couple of couples. And I bet they are all together as a big group more times than it seems. I like Jana's attitude, too.

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  6. Jana has a very lovely and unselfish attitude. No matter our situation, we can all benefit from reaching out to help others. I can't help but wonder, is it an expectation or does she feel it her duty to stay at home? There's no need to wait around for something to happen. Make a life for yourself and if you find your soulmate in the process, wonderful.
    Also, I am somewhat puzzled by her comment that she "can't" go along on outings with the married siblings because she's not a part of that group. She's still a sister. What are they doing that it is found necessary to exclude her?
    Some may accuse me of making hateful comments. I would say to those same people that there are a lot of very impressionable folks who have a sense of hero worship when it comes to the Duggars. They may think that everything they do is a sign of being a Christian worthy of salvation. This is not healthy. Accepting ideas without asking questions is never a good thing.

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    1. There is no Christian or human dead or alive that is worthy of salvation. Salvation is a gift we can't earn it. I imagine when she says she can't go with her siblings it's more a don't want to be a third wheel situation which is understandable she seems reserved and respectful so it would be natural to not go to the couple events

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    2. Could not have put that better myself!

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    3. You all have to relax about Jana she is probably the most healthiest, unselfish women for her age. Have you not ever been the only single around a bunch of couple, not fun being the third wheel. Does not mean she is never with them, she is trying to reach out and encourage other single women and relate. She isn't asking for anyone's sympathy, she isn't miserable and maybe she is quite content where she is

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  7. FTA: "Waiting is not always easy," she tells Crown of Beauty. "Especially in those times when all the married siblings are getting together and you can’t go along because you're not part of 'that' group..." "That" group ought to be ashamed of themselves.

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    1. Doesn't seem healthy and I must agree if the case. Especially after Jana doing so much for them.

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    2. All of my friends are married and I'm still single. Never have I once been excluded. Poor Jana

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    3. Agreed! You should not exclude people on such a basis or for that matter ever. Don't say that you should always go with all the 19 siblings but hopefully you know what I mean.

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    4. No kidding! I don't understand this exclusion at all. Is there a hierarchy?

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    5. A lot of times the married couples will go on a couples retreat that is only for married couples. Jana wouldn't be able to go to those

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    6. Now that Derick and Jeremy are gone, who is left in "that group" other than Ben & Josh? Are they the ones making her feel unwelcome?

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    7. Maybe when they were all home, they got together. Now that Joy is engaged, she probably has officially joined the group. Jana has no older girl to hang with. Could be why she and Michelle are out a lot together lately. Which is thoughtful of Michelle!

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    8. 4:33 You picked up on what I was wondering. Even when a kid, wasn't Jessa the one that teased Jana, by kicking her feet on the upper bunk, almost kind of a bullying? My younger siblings pulled those kinds of tricks on me. I can see how with those two couples she would feel uncomfortable. The fact that they are married and have kids, unlike Jana, is kind of a power play for them as well. It is sad she feels that way.

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    9. Yes, Jessa was not kind to Jana. The parents handled it by having Jana give Jessa her prized possession. I always wondered why Jessa didn't have to give Jana anything or if Jessa was punished at all. Instead, the only punishment we hears about was Jana's/the victim.

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    10. @11:43 and @11:57
      Jesse was not kind to Jana. That is true. I've done those same unkind things to my sister.
      BUT her parents DIDN'T HANDLE IT! SHE DID! She gave Jessa her prized possession to show her that she loved her and that she wanted a good relationship. Her parents didn't force her to do anything.
      Relationships are much more valuable than your most valuable possession. Jana grew up knowing this. That is why she did not lose by giving Jessa her jewelry box, but won a relationship. A friendship really.
      Be NICE PEOPLE!

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    11. It said in the book that Michelle suggested Jana give Jessa a prized possession. As obedient a child as I believe Jana was, she would have taken her mom's suggestion. So the parents did have a say in this solution. But I can't remember, did the relationship get better after that?

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    12. 2:26 - Yes, her parents DID handle it. It's in their book and the girls also speak about it. The parents suggested Jana give Jessa her prized music box. It wasn't Jana's idea. Supposedly the relationship got better after that, and I'm sure Jana learned from the experience to "turn the other cheek." But what kind of a message did that send Jessa? What did Jessa learn? To torment someone, and they'll be your doormat?

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  8. Encouraging words. It's interesting to hear Jana's thoughts on being single. :)

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  9. I understand where Jana is coming from. I didn't get married until I was 32 and it was very hard waiting on the Lord for the right man. So I did what Jana did. I served the Lord wherever I was needed and it was such a blessing. I wouldn't have traded those experiences for the world.

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  10. To be honest that makes me feel a little sad for her. I'm glad she finds comfort in reaching out to others but I wish that she was able to go out into the world in a more typical way that might allow her to get to know more men since it seems like she is pretty interested in finding someone (as opposed to enjoying being single, which is some people's preference).

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  11. Oh, Jana, just go with them when the "marrieds" get together. Our family would never exclude a few because they're not married.

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    1. I agree. I am one of 8 and never married even though that was and still is the desire of my heart.( I'm 63) I have spent my life serving others which has kept me from dwelling on myself, but I never missed an opportunity to be with my siblings and their spouses. And they never left me out. I do hope the married Duggar's invite Jana and when she says no that they insist she come. I do pray the Jana receives the desires of her heart.

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    2. But your family isn't the Duggars, 12:08......

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    3. I get the feeling she wasn't invited to go.

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  12. Im glad Jana is doing service work. You are in the service of the lord when you are in the service of others...
    What bothered me most is how she stayed she CANT go out with her married siblings because she's not part of that group. Is she isolated from those siblings now they are married? Can she not leave her house on her own free will to visit her sisters???( well only Jessa and soon to be joy now sing jinger is in Tx and Jill is on CA) does she still need an accountability partner to go places??? I feel pure sadness for Jana. Not because she is single but because of her restrictions in life. Prayers go to her...

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  13. I hope Jana is always welcome with her married siblings. I have been married for 30 years. My sister has never been married and we are nearly the same age. We enjoy times together. We are actually going on a vacation together.

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  14. Good for you, Jana! The right one will come along at the right time! I figure with all the upcoming weddings and babies, Jana is keeping plenty busy!

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  15. That is a great attitude that Jana has! She is a jem!

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  16. Ok but why can't she go out with the married siblings? It's not an exclusive club!!!

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    1. I know! They should invite her to do things with them. Maybe she would meet someone that way.

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    2. The Duggars call it "double dating."

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    3. Oh, so you can only go out on a date AFTER you're married?

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    4. Dawn -- Right on!

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  17. Very well said Jana. I admire her poise and her willingness to serve. Something amazing is ahead for her. She will be blessed beyond measure!

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    1. But it seems that a lot people on this blog and the exact same faith as Jenna see being blessed beyond measure as synonymous with getting married and having a lot of children... and I hope she doesn't feel that way cause I think it is not synonymous. Just my oppinion!

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    2. 3:13 PM -- You are 100% right. The Bible does not promise us automatic blessings here on earth for following Jesus. We are looking forward to the ultimate blessing in heaven. Many very devout Christians will have horrible hardships here on earth. Look at Paul, Stephen, etc.

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  18. I didn't get married until I was 41, but God has taken me on many adventures.

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  19. Keep seeking after to Lord, Jana. God has different plans for each of us. What a boring place this would be if we all were the same and did the same exact things! Press on...the Master is coming...we are not done yet!

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    1. What does a "coming Master" have to do with whether or not Jana has a husband?

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    2. 4:26 "The Master" has everything to do with it. Jana is waiting for Him to guide her in her choices.

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    3. It means that regardless of how your life turns out here on earth, there is another, infinitely better home awaiting those who follow the Master.

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    4. Lol the Master has really bad connotations. Can we call Christ something else?

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  20. I enjoy hearing her take on waiting. I watched my sister marry her high school sweetheart when she was 21, I was 24. Eleven years later and I'll marry my sweetheart at 35. God has a true plan for all of us. Blessings to you Jana and family!

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  21. Jana you are a beautiful young lady. I know your family is close but have you ever thought of moving out on your own or with a few siblings. I'm sure there is a home you all own you can move into. You can still help around the house but have some you time as well. I am a Christian and live the Lord and living on your own is okay. Good luck God Bless.

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    1. No single siblings left to live with, other than the boys. The remaining single girls are too young, or about to get married.

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    2. Maybe she could move in with John David; he lives on his own. S.

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    3. @ 12:45, I commend your encouraging words!
      Jana you are beautiful and strong inside and out! You don't need to feel trapped.

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  22. i want to know why Jana cant join the "married" on their outings...im sorry but it sounds like they dont think she is good enough for them....just good enough to be a servant to them....i use to like the duggars but now i think they are NOT nice at all....definately NOT christian attitudes.

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    1. Maybe Jana doesn't want to go out with the married couples on their outings.
      She is too good enough for them.

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  23. Love your heart and deep understanding of Gods sovereign will.

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  24. What a wonderful perspective she has.

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  25. I agree; why can't Jana go out with the married siblings? Nothing wrong with that; perhaps they can include a nice, single male friend someone might know and it WOULD NOT BE A SIN TO DO SO. Her parents need to give her a more proactive role in her own life.
    The marrieds aren't going to talk about married intimacy or private things of that nature; as it would be inappropriate for anyone; preacher to atheist to do so.
    Get out there, Jana.

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  26. Why wouldn't she be allowed to join in with the married couples? Do they share secret married talk? Marriage is a union between 2 people not an elitist club that shuns those who aren't married.

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  27. Jana seems like (I have never met her) a lovely young woman. I think her married sisters and brother-in-laws should be happy to spend time with her. Do the married Duggars have nothing to talk about besides being a married couple? Do they think that Jana wouldn't be able to relate? Sounds really boring. My husband and I would be honoured to have the company of this gentle-spirited lady

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  28. Jana has had many suitors come along. She is being way to picky. There is no such thing as a Perfect Man or Woman. She is not even given any man a chance to win her Heart. If she keeps this up she will remain alone forever like my Uncle who was looking for a Perfect female. It doesn't work like that. Especially if you don't give anyone a chance plain and simple.

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    1. Great point. She has talked about having many suitors. I believe Zach Bates was among them. But glad he ended up with Whitney. They're a great couple.

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  29. I love her attitude! I was married at 31...never had a boyfriend before I met my husband. I was in ministry and prayed for the man I would marry to be in ministry, too. He was just the church intern at first, and then became the youth pastor a few months later. We became good friends in the ministry, and then, God started changing things for us and we were married two years later. It is true to just look around and pray for ministry opportunities. I got involved in so many things that now having children could never do. My two younger sisters were married before I was, and so it was hard for me while I was still waiting. But like Jana, focusing on others keeps the focus off of yourself.

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  30. I feel Jana's Pain. i'm 20 and still single. It's difficult sometimes but we need to be faithful

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    1. Hi Leticia! I understand how difficult it can be to wait for the one. I did meet my husband til I was 32 and got married at 33. Keep the faith :)

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    2. leticia - What a shame that you find it difficult to be "still single" at 20. You are very young and have so much ahead of you. I'm awfully glad I didn't get married that young because I matured and learned so much during that time. I am also thankful that my own kids, 19 and 21, are in no rush to get married. Learn how to be happy and content all by yourself first... you can't expect a man to do it for you.

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  31. It really is better to wait, not just from a Christian point of view but you won't be happier married to the wrong guy than single. The important thing is to have good friends, especially now some of her sisters are leaving the family home. So I hope Jana has, or makes, some dear friends and enjoys lots of fun times as a single lady until she meets her Mr Right. (Or Mr Handsome lol).

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  32. I don't think Jan meant that she "never" does things worth get married siblings, but it is different. I am so happy, that in a "season" of waiting, she isn't sitting around feeling sorry for heraelf. You can see the difference in the comments by being "self"-centered, not Christ-centered. Bless you, Jana. He will reward you, now and in the days and Eternity to come.

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  33. This is the first we've heard her admit that she has difficult days.

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  34. Jana your precious and your family knows this if the Lord wills you for marriage it will be very beautiful as you are. God gave you the family you have for a purpose and reason which no family is perfect but your family did somethings amazing by having all you beautiful kids in the Lord.

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  35. What siblings is Jana supposed to live with? The oldest of the younger girls is 11 years old.

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  36. In all the decades this family has been"seeking the Lord", haven't they found Him yet? It's a bit silly to continually seek him. He's right there for all. Live your life, Jana.

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    1. Not at all silly to day by day ask what is right. We are supposed to counsel with the Lord before making decisions and this is a difficult discipline. I don't keep my heart and mind close enough to the Lord by seeking Him continually in all things, but I want to, His peace is what I want all the time, but it doesn't just be right there. It is somehow more difficult than that.

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    2. I think what they mean by this is "going deeper". It doesn't matter how long you have followed Christ we are always learning and drawing closer. Just saying we know Him is empty.

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    3. Chill. It's an expressing meaning that you are following God in everything you do.

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    4. Well said! The Lord *is* right there for all of us!
      And I also don't think it is a prerequisite to feel joy and contentment in seeking the Lord when you are in fact sad or disillusioned.

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    5. Seeking the Lord doesn't mean literally looking for Him, it means consistently seeking His will. Our selfish desires often take over (like saying things you regret when you are angry). When you seek Him always you are purposing to have the right response to situations in your life by praying, reading the word, etc. We should never stop growing in our faith and knowledge of Him.

      I wish I was as focused on Christ at Janas age and she is. Nothing negative to say, you are doing great Jana! I know how hard it is to wait in life! I wish I had been an encouragement to other people like you are. I look back at those single years and I think of how much more joy I would have had and given to others and most importantly to God had I been joyfully single and not sad. I have the most amazing husband and had I had the confidence in Gods timing I would have been happy in those single years and more productive for His kingdom.

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  37. It makes me so sad that simply moving out, getting a job, going to university...making choices on your own just doesn't seem to be an option for the Duggar girls.

    I'm also a Christian but I was raised in a very different way. When I was in my 20s I was living on campus, sharing an apartment with friends. I remember cooking together and having endless conversations around the kitchen table...so much laughter and friendship! I also discovered the world, spending two semesters abroad in Italy and the UK....I'm so grateful for these memories!

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    1. Yes the Duggars have appreciated some career women in their lives.

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    2. That is great for you but obviously she doesn't want do that. There is nothing wrong her decisions, she is old enough to make her own choices.

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  38. I want to comment on those who are concerned that Jana can't hang out with the group of married couples. I beleive what she is saying that she would feel like the "odd man out" with everyone paired off. Before I was married I felt very awkward when I went to lunch after church with a group of married or engaged couples.
    I doubt it is against the "rules" for her to not be with her married siblings. Jana is a very godly woman and if I had a 27 year old son I would love for him to meet Jana.

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    1. We all know that many men are not the type who would make good husbands, so Jana be patient for Mr Right. Because you are much, much better off single, than if you are shackled to a Mr Wrong for the rest of your life!

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    2. Finally someone said it!
      Chill out people, read between the lines and you'll see it's not

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    3. It is not to the other's credit if they have a situation where she feels like the "odd man out".

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  39. So Kendra, who's about 10 years younger, is going to be included in these "couples" things, but Jana, who's a blood relation, is not? That makes no sense at all.

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    1. Totally agree.

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    2. We need to get over the couples thing and realize that for now she is content and not willing to get married. She wants to wait for the right person.

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    3. But she's not content! She made a point of saying how she feels left out, and that she has hard days!

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  40. Jana is a beautiful girl, inside and out. I think she has a very healthy outlook.

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  41. Great words Jana! It is really hard to wait for the one God has for you. I am almost 29 and never dated and seeing everyone at our church getting married was hard at some point. But just like you said, "we need to be busy where God has us". He calls us to be faithful and one day at His given time, He will give us the desire of our hearts. God bless you and your family! I pray that God continues to give you strength and patience in this time of waiting.

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  42. Is it inconsistent that Jinger met Jeremy through her married sister and brother in law and now Jana is supposed to stay out of that group?

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    Replies
    1. You really need to focus on what Jana is saying. She is enjoying where she is now and waiting to see what the future will hold. I think we all need move past the fact that she doesn't feel comfortable going with married sibling on their "couples dates".

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    2. Why isn't it not a kind heart that worries about fellow human beings being excluded for such a flimsy reason? Especially when it is your sisters doing the excluding?

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  43. I am wondering what happens when, say, one of their children does not get married until their thirties. Will they just continue to live at home and not work outside the home (besides volunteering and ministry)? Are unmarried adult women not allowed to move out? Just curious. I am moved out because I'm in university, but I'm far from being married.

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    Replies
    1. I alla curious too! Do they most live in the "house" if they are not karriär?

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    2. We will have to wait and see what they choose to do.

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  44. Funny how Jana never shared these thoughts with TLC or People magazine.

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  45. It concerns me to see so many comments from people who think it's wrong for Jana to still be at home. Clearly she is not being held there against her will, and clearly she has had more real-world experience than the average young woman. I have lived the life that so many of these commenters are insisting she should live. If I could go back and do it again, and was given the option of living the life Jana has, I would jump at the chance. I don't care that she isn't doing the normal, average thing - in my opinion, the only things she is missing out on are detrimental things.

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    Replies
    1. I don't think she's being held hostage. But I do wonder if she's staying with her parents because it's an expectation or she's been conditioned to believe that she should. Her "real world experiences" have been within the watchful eyes of her parents.
      Contrary to what you may think, many of us who have lived independently, gone to a secular college, etc., are not necessarily living lives of complete debauchery or regret. I certainly am not.

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  46. Jana is right where God wants her. I feel she is fine with being single for now. She is beautiful, talented and giving - she will make a wonderful wife when it is time. She seems to have a full life. It seems others have a problem with her not being married but she is fine with it. Lets just enjoy Jana for Jana. God Bless her.

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  47. I used to enjoy reading the comments section...now...smh😞

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  48. Jana is my favorite and I am proud of her for waiting for that special someone to come along. She is not rushing into anything and it will happen when it does. She seems to be doing fine to me.

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  49. in the church i come from we can devout our lives to being single and leading others to jesus and the gospel because some women aren't called to married life

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  50. As a single 29 year old (soon to be 30) Christian, I can relate to what Jana is saying. My upbringing has been quite different. I have a college degree and a Master's degree, a career, and have been living on my own for quite some time. However, seeing all of my friends go through relationships, get engaged, married and now starting to have families of their own is tough, no matter how content and grateful I am for the life I've been blessed with. Sometimes I am perfectly fine hanging out with all married couples being the third or fifth wheel and sometimes it is difficult to relate. I hope that Jana is truly happy and not just saying these things to address the constant rumors and questions of when she will enter a courtship.

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    Replies
    1. How wonderful that you're educated and out on your own with a career. May God bless you. :)

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  51. Many of us project our concerns onto Jana. We have no idea if she wishes to move out, have a career or even wants to marry at this time.

    She has a large close nit family who owns a busy and a brand together.

    It is actually advantageous for her there and build a career in improvement while being a TV Celebrity (which she doesn't seem to like much).

    As far as marriage, well finding the right one and waiting ain't the same thing.

    God helps those who help themselves. Maybe she doesn't necessarily want to be in a place where a young man gets to know her better right now. Or maybe she has already met someone.

    It's all in the Lord's hand anyhow.

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  52. It's great that Jana is serving; but how about working outside the home, taking some college courses, travel and/or moving into to a place all her own with an 'approved" girl friend (maybe a Bates daughter?)?

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  53. Not everyone receives their heart's desire from God. At what point will it be approved for Jana to move from her parents home into a place of her own and lead her own life?

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    Replies
    1. She would remain there if she does not marry.

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  54. Jana has always seemed to me as very private, so I think she probably is hesitant to be in a relationship because of how much attention it would get, which I can completely understand!! Also, maybe she doesn't want the same lifestyle as her sisters and the men who have shown interest in her have been too much like her sisters husbands? Just a thought.

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  55. Jana always acts and looks happy to me. Joy-Anna was the one who acted and looked unhappy to me. I think she was the one who couldn't wait too get out of the house. I think Jana has a easy and good life. She doesn't have to work full time with grouchy and back stabbing co-workers. Working outside your home isn't always glamorous.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No situation is perfect. However, being able to support yourself is important. That's why it's a good idea to get a good education so you can pursue a career you will enjoy. You can't always rely on a man or your family to take care of you.

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  56. Kudos to Jana for not settling and being "picky" if you will...A women should never settle so she is part of a couple!!! I say go Jana and enjoy your life your way!!😁

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  57. I totally understand how Jana feels and appreciate the maturity she possesses. I was single until I was 39 with only a few dating relationships, but when I met my husband we were married 9 months later and I couldn't be happier. He was definitely worth the years of waiting! God's plan is perfect and can be trusted. It's just that simple.

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  58. Some young man is going to be extremely blessed to have this girl as his wife. What a faith filled testimony.

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    Replies
    1. That's for sure. She is a prize.

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  59. Jana is a very pretty girl but the older she gets the harder it will be to find a guy that meets the standards her family sets... especially when the older guys like Jeremy are marrying her little sisters!!

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    Replies
    1. I thought the same thing (@ 6:38) - What mature, independent, established guy her age will want to follow the Duggar courting standards even if he is a strong Christian? Surely, by that age they can be trusted to make the best decisions for themselves and how they would want to handle a dating/courting relationship, (ie. without chaperones), etc. I would guess that Jeremy wouldn't have done the courting thing they way it was done if it wasn't for JimBob's rules. I have also wondered how Jana must have felt about a guy her age marrying her younger sister? It's not something she'll ever reveal, I'm sure, because it would be too real for the show.

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  60. Jana is not being told by anyone that she cannot go out with her married siblings. Jana explained this in the episode Date Nights & Bright Lights. She said, “It’s this weird in between stage. I’m not a younger one, but then I’m not an older married one with kids,” “So [I’m] just being busy with where God has me right now and being content in this place and learning as much as I can.”
    Jana has always been the one that stays in the background. I am sure the siblings ask her all the time but she does not feel comfortable with the situation. She goes out with her married sisters all the time, just not when they are with their husbands.
    Most single people do not go on dates with their married friends unless they have a date.

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    Replies
    1. Your last sentence does not hold true for my family and friends and I've been married a long time.

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    2. Your last sentence doesn't hold true for me, either, and we don't call it a date if the people are married.

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  61. again whats the rush for jana to get married she has good smart brain on the shoulders and her right to wait most likely very happy w/ her choosen choices. there,s nothing wrong in any young woman choosing to have a career in something 1st

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  62. Dear Jana, you go ahead and take your sweet time. God has unlimited blessings coming your way. You're beautiful, and precious.

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  63. Maybe the reason they don't want her along is that they use the term "double date". Jim Bob and Michelle went on a "double date' with Austin and Joy. It seems awkward to call a night out with the folks a double date. Just call it going out to dinner together.

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    Replies
    1. I didn't realize that "double date" wasn't common. I've always called an outing with two couples a "double date," and I've heard it from plenty of others too.

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    2. I've never called it a "date" when people are married. If you're dating, you go on a "date." If you're married, you go out. That's how it is in California.

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    3. It's always be called double date. That's not awkward at all to call it a double date.

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    4. Here in Canada, I know couples married for 50 years who have a weekly "date night"! And when they go out with other couples, they call it "double date". Not unusual at all.

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  64. Live your life, Jana. Your life is only yours. Yours. Take care

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  65. I would not want my daughter, who was living at home with me, to publicly state that she was having "difficult days." That would break my heart!

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    Replies
    1. This family puts everything out there. They don't seem to value privacy. They aired their thoughts about Josh on TV too.

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    2. Why? Every single person that is alive has difficult days.

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    3. I never got married I lived with my Mom tell she died. I was 34. My Dad died when I was 20.

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    4. As a mother, I would feel that it was my duty to make sure my kids were as happy as could be, especially if they were living at home with me! If something was making my daughter sad, I would help her fix it or change it.

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    5. I would be very concerned, probably alarmed, for my daughter to be living at home without an education or a career at age 30. Yes, you're hoping she gets married, but what if she doesn't? Sounds like she's just sitting at home waiting for a fairy tale.

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    6. It would be a huge mistake for a mother to step in and try to fix everything to keep her child happy. Life brings good times and bad times, happy times and sad times. Children need to understand that growing up. We don't need them to get a false sense of what life is like. Then they will run from person to person or chase different pleasures trying to find and keep happiness. What would you like Jana's mother to do? Find her a husband? An arranged marriage? We can't and shouldn't try to fix all of our children's problems. We need to teach them how to fix their own problems or wait on God's timing for things. Jana is a happy person. She doesn't necessarily enjoy waiting to meet her future mate but again waiting is also part of life.

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  66. Jana makes a great point that waiting isn't always easy, but that doesn't always mean sitting still. God may be using you as a single adult in ways you don't even realize. God's timing is absolutely perfect and maybe God's still preparing that special someone for Jana and is strengthening her faith during this time of waiting.

    Right now I desperately want to be a mom. My husband and I have been trying for 3 years and are watching all our friends have children while we're still waiting. Though it's been really difficult our faith is definitely stronger because we are more dependent on the Lord. Keep the faith, Jana! God's got great things in store for you :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lauren, I have also had infertility and chronic miscarriage struggles. Check out Naprotechnology! It is cutting edge science that works with the woman's body without artificial rhormones, etc. it is also very ethical in its approach. I will pray for you! We have both bio and adopted children...God is good! I don't regret the 8 years we didn't conceive...we have a gorgeous adopted daughter who was totally meant to be part of this crazy family! Keep up your Hope!--Maggie

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    2. Lauren, I'm sending you a cyberhug!(((Lauren))) If you don't mind, I will be praying the Lord will bless you and your husband with a little one.

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    3. Thank you both!!! We really appreciate the prayers!!

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  67. at lauren sounds like maybe 1 or both just may have a real med issue this needs tobe checked by a real doctor in the feild of pregnancy and becoming pregnant.

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  68. To the poster who claims Jana has turned down many suitors. How do you know this? Maybe she is just shy around guys. She will let her guard down when the right one comes along!

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  69. Waiting is difficult, but when Jana finds the right man, he will be so blessed. I didn't meet my husband until I was almost 28, and we married when I was almost 30. He is more than worth the wait. The other thing we're waiting for still hasn't happened; we've been trying for almost ten years to have a baby. I only had one pregnancy, and we lost the baby. This has brought us closer in our marriage. God has His reasons for why things happen, and we just don't understand it. But He does. God bless you, Jana, and keep being the beautiful lady you are, inside and out.

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    Replies
    1. Please research naprotechnology and Dr. Kyle Beiter or Dr. Thomas Hilgers. It's innovative and ethical approach to a woman's cycle is refreshing!

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  70. I like hearing from Jana. She seems to have such a kind heart. As much as I love watching and learning about the romantic relationships in the family, I'd love to see a few more episodes on her and what she's doing. As a single, Christian 30-something who is not always "patiently waiting," I find her honesty and sweet nature both beautiful and inspiring.

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  71. I just read a comment here ,about Jana as she gets older,having a chaperone.
    It seems the parents should TRUST her accountability....or she wouldn't
    be getting to know a suitor....
    My goodness...❗️☘

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  72. I don't think they could possibly justify a 30 year old adult "child" of their still having to have a chaperone. That goes for the sons too. It's demeaning to them, IMO.

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  73. Jana is a level headed lady. She will know when and if the right one comes along. Staying single is not the worst thing in the world. Jana seems happy and contented.
    Joan,Marion and Marilyn

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  74. I feel so bad that everyone is on this poor girl's case for "still" being single. I'm sure she hates that people focus on that. However, I can't help but to wonder what's going on with this. She's so pretty - I'm sure she's had a ton of guys try to win her over. It makes me think she maybe experienced some heartache along the way or, perhaps, isn't overly interested in men or finding a husband (unlikely, but it does cross my mind). If it's what she wants, I hope she finds her Prince Charming.

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