Wednesday, April 21, 2021

Vuolos Speak about Tension with the Dillards


"Family is strong, and so there's going to be difficulties in every family. ...So many families go through different issues, especially as children are growing, and this family happens to be in the public spotlight."

-Jeremy Vuolo

In December, we posted about Jinger and Jeremy Vuolo's upcoming book, "The Hope We Hold." (To pre-order the book, you can visit the publisher's website.) 

Ahead of the May 4th release date, the Vuolos did an interview with Us Weekly. One of the topics they discussed was the tension between Jill and Derick Dillard and the rest of the Duggar family. The link to that interview can be found below.

Us Weekly: Jinger Duggar and Jeremy Vuolo Hope Jill Duggar and Derick Dillard Reconcile with the Family

Photo courtesy jingerandjeremy.com

106 comments:

  1. I didn't think much of Jill going on and on about family issues. Now we have Jeremy and Jinger doing the same thing to sell his book. Sad.

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    1. It definitely seems like they’re exploiting their struggles to sell their book.

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    2. I think he loves the spotlight as well.he seem to do stuck on himself too

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    3. I agree OP. It's sad that a pastor feels it necessary to talk about this in public, especially when it's only his side of the story. I'm sure Jill isn't appreciating it.

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    4. Agree. "If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.” Derick got his payout, it's time to live by what you say you believe. Among Christians, if you feel you've been wronged, you are to go to that person privately, not on your vlog or in a book. To Jill I would say, counselors can lead vulnerable people astray, and btw, you already HAVE a "wonderful counselor" in Jesus Christ. Perhaps we could see and hear more of HIM in your life and not just on t-shirts.

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    5. I disagree Amy2. Sometimes you need a person from outside your family and your religion in order to solve your problem. Counselors are trained to listen objectively and to help analyze the situation, guiding people towards a real solution. Turning only to religion to solve a problem can leave you feeling guilty within those parameters, when no guilt should exist or when the solution lies outside the church walls. Have pastors in certain religions been preaching against seeing secular counselors? I suspect that they have been, from what you stated and from what I've read elsewhere.

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    6. Jinger and Jeremy have a large following....this gives them an opportunity to share the gospel and how we can lean on Christ in times of trouble and give him praise in times of joy.

      Secrets help no one! Sharing family troubles and personal struggles can help others. None of us would be here if we didn't follow this family....

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    7. There are good Biblical counselors available for those who want/need one...please don't lead others astray by saying counselors are unnecessary.

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    8. 2:48PM: I agree. It bothered me that Jeremy did 95% of the talking in this video. It's about Jinger's family and she should be doing the talking. I wouldn't want my husband publicly giving his analysis about my family. Jinger should have done 95% of the talking.

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    9. Agee also. This is a ploy to get followers to buy their book. If they truly loved Jill and Derick -they would have spoken out before and not waited till they were making round to dig up interest in their book. They have never publically reached out to Jill and in fact their posts have either ignored Jills family or Jinger would schedule an event at the same time Jill and Derick were doing their Q&A sessions. So suddenly now the love them and want reconciliation? Additionally if they are on such good terms - why haven’t Jill and Derick discussed that it why didn’t the four of them make this announcement?

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    10. Amy2, so well said! Scripture is pure truth and has the answer for the issues/problems/struggles of every seeking person. While there are good counselors, I've witnessed, as you mention, that many lead vulnerable people astray - not necessarily on purpose but they are human with biases and perspectives of their own. Seek The Counselor.

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  2. Yeah complaining about Jill and Derrick will lead to "reconciliation". Why would Jeremey and Jinger think that will help? Whatever will sell books is more like it.

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    1. So assumption verses comprehension of what they said.

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    2. He wasn’t complaining about Jill and Derick. He was saying how very much they enjoyed them, and how they needed time with this issue.

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    3. Yes, this is a ploy to sell books.

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  3. Thank you for posting this. I've been praying for the family to reconcile and it will take some time. But I pray that they will reconcile before it's too late and one of them is gone.

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  4. Nothing like pouring a bit of gasoline on the fire is there? Airing family problems in a gossip magazine isn't going to lead to "reconciliation".

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    1. What? They responded to a question with grace and love for Jill. Did you read it?

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  5. Now Jeremy is an author. Perhaps his book will become a best seller and they won't need to depend on the TV show for their livelihood.

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    1. Who said Jeremy is an author? It’s their book not his. And they probably used a ghost writer like most celebrities do when they write books.

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    2. I doubt that book will be a best seller.

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  6. I've pre-ordered the book and I'm looking forward to learning more about them and their walk with Christ. xoxo

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    1. I'd rather make a donation to someone who truly needs it than spend money on a book from a "celebrity." They can say anything they want in a book and expect you to believe it, especially if it promotes them.

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  7. Have to wonder if Derrick didn’t know about the money situation before he married Jill. They were both adults. Surely they discussed it

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    1. I think one of the factors he married Jill was that she was on TV show and Derick thought he will be rich a famous too. Then he got disappointed to find out he can't cash out on anything there, so he started a conflict with Jill's family.

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    2. Completely agree @11:20

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    3. 11:20 And your evidence that your scenario is based on facts?

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    4. Both husbands did, honestly

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  8. I have to say the tension between Jill and her family is sad. I was shocked she and her husband choose to make it very Public considering all the negative publicity Jill endured in the past. As a motherI have to say my heart goes out to Michelle, this cannot be easy for her. I have always been a fan of Michelle Duggar watching her over the years she always said she and her family weren't perfect but I feel she has provided me with good advice about life issues as a whole. Just my opinion.

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    1. I hold JB and Michelle responsible for putting their family on TV and the spotlight. I feel sorry for the kids who really had no say in the matter while they were growing up. As adults, it's now their choice on whether to continue with sacrificing privacy for a paycheck. It seems Jeremy likes the attention. I have respect for the Dillards, considering they were willing to abandon that way of life. If the rest of the family has a hard time with that, it's their problem.

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    2. @8:37 They abandoned the show but not the public life (see their social media, YouTube, etc).

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    3. 4:01 There's a big difference between having a TV reality show and a social media presence.

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  9. There was literally no reason for them to do that other than collecting a check🙄

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    1. I agree. If the rest of the family can't accept that Jill and Derrick have moved away from their ultra conservative views so be it, but I don't think it's necessary to discuss it on national media.

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    2. Yes, I agree with you, 6:06PM.

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    3. Jill is right, her family doesn't understand boundaries.

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  10. Is it me or did Jinger seem kind of sad? And when Jeremy said struggles with kids, his body language shrugged his shoulder towards Jinger. I don’t know, just an observation.

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    1. Jinger never comes across well in videos. Jeremy always talks over her, interrupts her, or changes what she says. It's like watching father-daughter, not husband-wife.

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    2. Jinger would look like that when she and Jessa did interviews together,when they lived at home. Jessa did most of the talking and you always wonder what Jinger was thinking.

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  11. Uhm, no Jeremy, this family doesn't "happen to be in the public spotlight". You all have put yourselves there and continue to put yourselves in the public spotlight, courting attention: "Breakout Stars of TLC's Counting On"; promoting yourselves on social media; publicly promoted launching of your brand-based merch; writing and promoting a book about yourselves and your experiences; and paid interviews like the one referenced in the article above. A little honesty, particularly for a pastor and his wife who claim to follow Jesus, would be seriously refreshing. As a Christian, I'm commanded by God to be upright in all my ways. I don't appreciate it when someone claiming Christ starts downplaying, minimizing, and hedging...much less when they're in a pastoral position.

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    1. So right..if they hate the spotlight so much then stop bringing it up and go back to being regular folke like they once were many years ago..jill living her life..when they wrote their book the first thing on top of the bokk was "stars of counting on" they couldve left that off the book and just had the their names and the cover..he know he love the spotlight geesh just admit it sir

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  12. It seems telling that in this narrative, the rest of the family is presented as one monolithic unit, rather than a group of many individuals (including many grown adult children) with independent views and relationships.

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  13. Gotta say I wasn’t a Jeremy fan until this article. I think he was kind hearted and practical and he stood up for the Duggar family, while also being supportive of the dillards. It’s unfortunate Derek doesn’t have his character.

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    1. Derick has the courage to stand up for what he thinks is right, and I think that is admirable. Jeremy is only going along with popular opinion so he doesn't lose the spotlight and the fame and money that he's sure will come with it.

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    2. What, kind hearted for the money, it's bad enough for the Dillards earning money from that rift now the vuolo have to earn from it too, magazines, books, show earnings not enough for them.

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    3. 11:11 The Dillards may earn a limited amount of money from their YouTube channel, where they've hosted Q&A's and the subject of the family rift has come up. I admire their candor and they have every reason to address questions and present their side of things. By not saying anything at all, it allows for rampant conjecture and rumor to create a storyline that simply isn't accurate. If the Vuolos want to confirm that they have a good relationship with the Dillards, that's fine- but I think they should leave it at that.

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  14. I think they handled the questions on Jill very well. It was a good interview.

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    1. I totally agree!! Jeremy did great with how he brought it out! And lovely to see that they are good friends with Jill and Derick. I totally feel for the Dillards. They may not have done everything right, (we are all human and make mistakes) but neither have Jill’s parents (they are also human) and am happy that they are working towards reconciliation

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  15. It's worse when one side thinks they are never wrong. My father just abused and abused and now he's 71 and he's realising his family is all gone he wants me to be there and to meet his only gran daughters he has never net but it is too little, too late.

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    1. Don't feel guilty about that, Unknown. Some people are users and abusers and will walk all over you if given the chance. There's only so much that talking about it can solve if behaviors will never change. Sometimes our lives are better if we leave certain people out and get on with making the best life for ourselves and our children that we want them to have, a life free of the pain of abusive people. Don't be made to feel guilty about that, because pulling at heartstrings when true remorse isn't there is one type of manipulative behavior. I know, I've seen it. It's not your problem to solve for your father, it's his problem to solve for himself. If he won't get therapy and won't change, then there's little you can do without getting hurt again.

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  16. I think we all get it. Jill and Derrick have moved away from the ultra conservative views held by the rest of the family. Now there's this huge "rift" that is being discussed on social media. Yikes. Nothing like airing your problems for the public to savor.

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  17. Seems like many are reading the headline and deciding what they said versus reading what they said.

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    1. Yes! They actually said very little and kept it surface-level and bland.

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  18. I don't feel Jinger and Jeremy should discuss Jill and Derick in this way. It is not their story to tell. I feel they jus want to sell a book. They have tried several endeavors to make money but I feel they have changed so much since their Laredo days. it seems being famous is their main goal. They just come off to me as very phony. I feel disappointed in them.

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  19. Shouldn't the rest of the family be lead to reconciliation, or is it just the responsibility of the Dillards?

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    1. Well do you see JB and Michelle compromising their beliefs? I think both sides are pretty locked in to their positions and nothing is going to happen.

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    2. I totally agree!!! It’s not all on the Dillards!!!!

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    3. Whenever there is a break in fellowship (relationship) between two Christ-followers, I think both parties bear the responsibility to be reconciled. If they cannot settle it themselves, they need to bring in Christian counselors (if they cannot agree on a counselor for whatever reason, each party should bring their own counsel), using the Bible as their counseling manual. Jesus and God are not at odds with one another, do not take advantage of each other, and do not abuse their positions of authority, nor each demand their own way (much less at the expense of the other. Therefore, neither should we as Christ-followers. If they cannot be reconciled (pride/arrogance, refusal to admit sin, minimizing both the sin and damage done to the other party, unwillingness to admit one's role in the conflict, refusal to recognize another's authority/autonomy, etc.), separation is in order to protect the injured party from the offender. When it comes to Believers, Jesus instructed his disciples to forgive IF the other brother repents. Repentance is not an "I'm sorry". It is a walk-a determined course of action that takes the full weight of responsibility, maps out a plan to avoid re-offending (personal responsibility + accountability), and is marked by measurable progress...before fellowship is restored. (Luke 17:3 is very specific about a Believer sinning against another Believer).

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    4. @5:39 How would Michelle and JimBob be compromising their beliefs by having a relationship with the Dillards? If they expect Jill and Derick to follow all the Duggar rules according some script or else, that is not reasonable or loving. I think you can have a relationship with your family, despite religious or other differences.

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    5. They aren’t “two Christ followers;” they’re her parents.

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  20. I feel like unless Jim Bob turns away from his headstrong way, this may never come to a reconciliation. It makes me very sad 😢

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  21. Off-topic, but has anyone else noticed this? Jinger and Jessa, best friends growing up, each married a man with a personality like their sister. Ben is quiet and passive like Jinger, and Jeremy is talkative and assertive like Jessa.

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    1. Maybe they married the wrong man. Lol

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  22. For a family to be so religious I find it hard to believe this is happening.What happened to Forgiveness for Jill and Josh who are we to condemn him. He will meet God one day.There is plenty of money to go around for all those 19 children. We all know money is the root of all EVIL.Still praying for the family. Love one another no matter what. Life is to short. One day someone will not be here

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    1. They sure forgave Josh in a hurry but they will not extend that same forgiveness to Jill and Derick. True Duggar colors are showing.

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    2. The LOVE of money is the root of all evil.

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    3. In all honesty, nobody really knows if Michelle and Jim Bob have forgiven them or not' because they are not talking about it. Jill and Derick are the ones who did. It's a little sad that so many people have decided that the Duggars are the ones who are wrong when they only have one side of the story.

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  23. Honestly I did not know there was any kind tension in the family. Praying for reconciliation.

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  24. Why do they think a tabloid is the place to air their private issues? There's no reason to other than self-promotion and money. For people who won't show their children's faces online any more, I find that hypocritical.

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    1. 3:37... I find that GREAT parenting... protecting their family.... they will post as THEY choose...

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  25. A book. The quest for fame and fortune continues.

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  26. Makes you wonder if someone is aiming for a mega church of his own. Another Joel Osteen?

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    1. Why are people offended by a pastor with money.....

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    2. Anon 10:34 I think they're more offended by how the pastor acquired his money.

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    3. Anon 10:34- What did Jesus have to say about material wealth? The book of Matthew, especially chapter 19, makes it pretty clear.

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  27. Why do the Duggars insist on talking with the gossip and Hollywood magazines? Jessa in an interview with Megan Kelly years ago did not have a positive attitude toward the magazine.

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    1. It beats working to earn a living.

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    2. Personally, I think it's easy money (a quick monetary hit, if you will).

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  28. So Jeremy is trying to be the "peacemaker". It will be interesting to see how that pans out.

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    1. Nothing like publicly trumpeting trying to make peace in a family matter.

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  29. Wow is nothing private and personal with this family? Have they ever heard don't air your dirty laundry to the public. Discuss this in private not for the world to comment on. I like Jill a lot and for her husband standing beside her through this. Beauitful couple. Feel Jim doesn't like her husband protecting her. Can't control her anymore Jim can't. Bless you Jill and Derrick.

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  30. I am worried about Jinger. She looks so sad and blank in her eyes. She nods but it it doesn’t look real. I feel like something is going on. I hope she’s ok

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    1. She's likely stressed, which is not unexpected with adding a new baby (changes in schedule, feedings, more to do). Add in the merchandise launch, podcasts, book promotion, and family drama = stressors. Trying to keep the family drama under wraps = major stressor. Having your family drama play out on a public stage = major stressor. One of the biggest hazards of being a reality TV show personality. The attention and subsequent paychecks are great when it's positive; a nightmare when it's negative.

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  31. I used to really enjoy the show -- especially the earliest 14 Kids and Counting days. But I've come to realize that Jim Bob did not serve his family well by getting them involved in reality TV. As head of the home, his wife and family are his first priority, and while the show greatly enriched them financially and offered opportunities for travel and spinoff ventures such as paid media interviews, what damage has it done to their relationships? This really saddens me.

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    1. What damage and to what relationship? It's only one Jill who separated from the family, and mostly because her husband wanted so. So pretty much Jill is still following the family's principles of submitting to a man, to her husband.

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  32. When Jill and Derick had publicly made it known about their family problems with Jim Bob and Michelle it made me disappointed in Jill. I know that when Jim Bob and Michelle first started being on TV it was at first their specials about being a family with 14 plus children which grew into 19.
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    Whatever Derick's intentions were when deciding to court Jill was wrong as well, it makes me think that their courtship started off on a lie. How is that OK?
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    I'm glad that Jinger and Jeremy have decided to write a book and discuss where they stand or where they are with Jill.
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    I only hope and pray that Jill and the family come together again.

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    1. Why do you think these problems are all Jill and Derrick's fault? I would say that no one is blameless in the matter but perhaps one day they can work thinks out.

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    2. The family problems were already known, or at least the subject of rumor and speculation, before the Dillard’s addressed them openly. I don’t fault them for laying their cards on the table.

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    3. Of course, Derick became prayer buddies with JB to have access to Jill! He knew JB would love how religious he was and agree to his meeting Jill!!!

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    4. I think their courtship was based on Derick wanting to join the TV family and have fame.

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    5. Well, even if their courtship started as a lie, they now have 2 kids and a dog. Jill lost her family relationship, yes, but Derick is probably was paid his law school tuition and the house they live in by his wife's father. So he gained.

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    6. I doubt their courtship started off "on a lie." I think Derick and Jill genuinely liked each other and still do. I think it was Jim Bob being involved that sent things sideways later. Two's company, three's a crowd, especially when one can't stop needing to be controlling.

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    7. Derick is mostly unhappy that they were not paid for the show. I think that’s the main problem.

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  33. Money is not the root of all evil. The love of money is the root of all evil. There is a difference

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  34. That was a very generic statement he made. Just saying 'reality'. And most people with this education, experience, public noteriety will write a book. It's his purpose too, leading, guiding, counseling. Can't imagine a reason to comment complaints.

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  35. That was a very generic statement he made. Just saying 'reality'. And most people with this education, experience, public noteriety will write a book. It's his purpose too, leading, guiding, counseling. Can't imagine a reason to comment complaints. And I'd even read the book when it's out.

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  36. maybe they should mind their own business.

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  37. They didn’t expose secrets to sell a book because everyone already knows what’s going on. Often celebrities try to explain things because the media will blow things up. Those of y’all preaching need to take a look in the mirror because you are being judgmental.

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    1. Honestly, my brother-in-law is a "world renowned evangelist" and our family has been living with a family split for 30 years this February because of family drama (some of which they are responsible for). While I'm aware they've talked about us to others within their circle, we've basically "protected" them by not talking about it within Church circles. We've been waiting 30 years for them to "sit and let us reason together" and there's been some very minor (mostly self-seeking) "progress" made, but some of us are still waiting because we won't settle for anything less than them taking responsibility for their part (so far, they're unwilling to). We've been pressured along to forgive (we have), to restore them, so we can present this perfect family image. Not going to happen without honest responsibility and accountability. Not going to be devalued to make someone else look good. Personally, I think Jeremy and Jinger should have just said we love Jill & Derick and the Duggars, and it's their business, not ours.

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  38. I like to buy the book. Will it be in any stores after May 4?

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  39. Every family has its issued but most of us have enough sense not to discuss them in gossip magazines. I'm disappointed in Jeremy and Jinger.

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  40. Instead of kind of to-towing around all the Duggar family issues; just spill all the honest beans!!!

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  41. The best way to reconcile with your family is not to write a book about it or sell the story to a magazine. You'd think a pastor would know this. Very disappointed.

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  42. Christian, non-Christian; in the public eye; private as get-all; families have their issues. I have no issue with those that share publicly, vs. those that believe in not airing their laundry. Live and let live. I hope the best for all the families.

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  43. I’m actual surprised that a pastor training under John MacArthur would write a book like this. Seems like he would be encouraged to behave with more dignity.

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