Monday, March 4, 2019

'Love and Loss' Recap

Counting On "Love and Loss"

  • Jana, Jessa, Kendra, Lauren, and some of the little kids are baking groom’s cakes for John and Abbie’s wedding. “Why would you weigh your ingredients?” remarks Jessa, as she looks at the recipe she found online. “Who has a scale in the kitchen? Not me.” She admits she has never baked a cake because most of the Duggar siblings prefer ice cream over cake.
  • The cakes must be gluten-free, sugar-free, and aviation-themed. Several years ago, Abbie went off a bunch of foods and determined that her stomach feels better when she avoids gluten and sugar.
  • “Cooking gluten-free and sugar-free is not an easy task because almost everything we have either has gluten or sugar in it,” says John. “Unless you eat vegetables all the time,” jokes Abbie.
  • Jessa, whose assistant is Johannah, discovers that her baking powder is almost three years old, but she does a quick test (sprinkling it in hot water to see if it fizzes) and decides to use it. Their cake has a model airplane on top.
  • Meanwhile, Lauren, with assistants Jordyn and Josie, is feeling pretty confident in her baking abilities. Lauren is also gluten-free because gluten gives her stomach cramps. They arrange cupcakes in the shape of an airplane and decorate it with frosting.
  • At Joe and Kendra’s house, Kendra and Jenni take a couple tries to make a successful batter using a gluten-free flour mix and sugar substitutes. The bottom layer of the cake breaks as it comes out of the pan, but it tastes good, and they are able to cover it in frosting. Kendra and Jenni make paper airplanes and place them on the cake, along with cotton from Kendra’s indoor plants.
  • At the Duggar home, Jana is making a fourth cake, while Jackson and Tyler are making cardboard airplanes to decorate the cake. “That’s very different,” she says as tastes the batter. “It has more of a chalky consistency to it. I’m glad I’m not gluten free.”
  • Covering the cardboard airplanes in fondant is very difficult. Michelle steps in to help the boys, and the airplanes end up looking pretty good, although Jana admits at the end that she ended up redoing some of it.
  • When it comes time for John and Abbie to do a blind taste test, all the siblings gather in the Duggar kitchen to watch. There are a lot of laughs as the bride and groom share their thoughts. “Cake number three was a little dry and a little eggy maybe,” says John of Lauren’s cake. “Cake number three had some issues. I don’t know what was in there or what the making process was of it, but I just prayed and took a bite because there’s no telling what might happen to my body after eating that.”
  • After much deliberation, John and Abbie give out the awards.
    • Most difficult: Jana’s team
    • Most original: Lauren’s team
    • Best tasting: Kendra’s team
    • Best design: Jessa’s team
    • Best of show: Jana’s team
  • “You never want to be that person who’s pretty on the outside and rotten on the inside, but that’s what we were,” jokes Jessa.
  • John and Abbie say they probably won’t end up having a groom’s cake at their wedding. “I just feel like that’s one more cake that we probably aren’t going to eat anyway,” says John.
  • In Texas, Jinger and Jeremy take Felicity, who is now a few months old, back to San Antonio to visit Alicia the midwife. “Felicity is a very happy baby, and she’s all laughs and giggles,” says Jeremy. “She really likes people.”
  • Jinger and Jeremy are still adjusting to parenthood. “It’s amazing, becoming parents, how normal certain topics have become,” says Jeremy. “And now we don’t even think it’s strange to be talking about Felicity and her bowel movements.”
  • The midwife puts ink on Felicity’s feet and adds her footprints to the many baby footprints on the walls of the birth center.
  • Early in her pregnancy, Lauren starts feeling severe cramps and just assumes that she had eaten something with gluten in it, but she soon realizes that she is having a miscarriage. “It was late in the night, and I went to go to the restroom, and right there was the baby, gone,” says Lauren, crying. “I couldn’t believe it, and I was hoping it wasn’t true. I was hoping it was a bad nightmare and wishing I was going to wake up… It was the worst day of my life, really.”
  • “My mom and Mom Michelle have been a great comfort to me,” says Lauren when the producer asks if she wishes she hadn’t announced the pregnancy so early. “I am so glad that we told our whole family that were expecting, that they could help Siah and I through this time. We couldn’t have done it without their support and prayers.”
  • Lauren says that she and Josiah wrote letters to their baby and put them in a special box. “My comfort is that my baby is with Jesus and that I one day get to see my baby,” says Lauren.
  • “Maybe the Lord will bless us with another little one, a sibling for this one that’s gone,” says Josiah. “That’s kind of our hope.”

232 comments:

  1. I think everyone copes differently and if making this episode helped them to come to terms with thier loss by talking about their experience, then let them share whatever they feel. Many women go through this without support and maybe they can find a little comfort in knowing they are not alone, even though people won't like it to be showcased in a show this is real life for a lot us. I praise their courange ANS strength. Praying for their physical, mental and emotional health. Blessings to all.

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  2. OK TLC, we get it. The girls can't cook. How many more episodes will you spend getting this point across?

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    1. They're just showing something from their real life. People are always complaining that they don't show anything besides babies and weddings.

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    2. It's always been puzzling that many of the girls do not know how to cook since they are all heading for marriage and motherhood. The cake baking did not present them in a very good light.

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    3. I agree - one week it is Ben cooking chicken with the kids, then this week with cake off. . . . this show HAS to get more interesting.
      With Jill/Ben and kids no longer on the show that was disappointing - they were entertaining and had good senses of humor, now it is just boring IMO.

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    4. anon 534, do you mean Jill and Derrick?

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    5. My mistake - I usually double check

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  3. Dear Counting On, I enjoyed the cake competition. I was so glad to see the little ones on the show. The grooms cake was a good idea on John's part. Ties in with the engagement/wedding theme. It was very heart warming to hear Josiah and Lauren wrote letters to there baby and placed in a special box. I think it will help mend there hearts. Wondering what the next episode will be about? I wonder if it will be John and Abbie's wedding or Ben and Jessa's announcement? Natasha B.

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  4. I didn't understand the segment about the miscarriage. When Lauren started having cramps instead of seeking medical attention she just blew if off and then went in the bathroom, passed blood and said "the baby's gone". Did I miss something?

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    1. This happened late at night so it’s not like she could have just gone to the doctor, and you don’t rush to the ER just for cramping. It’s not uncommon to cramp/spot during your first trimester and for all we know she called her doctor and they told her to come in the next day. And she didn’t say she just passed blood, she said “and there was the baby”. My friend had a very similar experience to this, and since it was late at night when she started cramping her OBGYN told her to come in in the morning. However she lost the baby in the middle of the night. At 8-weeks gestation the baby is already the size of a raspberry, so she actually saw it, and Lauren evidently did too. It’s very sad, and there’s nothing any of them could have done to prevent it.

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    2. Um, that's what usually happens with a miscarriage. Pain, discomfort, bleeding. Immediately seeking medical attention may not be possible, and it won't do anything to stop a miscarriage, anyway. From her description it sounds like it happened pretty quickly. Besides, she didn't "blow it off." She explained that. She thought it was cramping from having eaten something with gluten.

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    3. You can't get medical attention for a miscarriage! It just happens and yes, sometimes very quickly. I have had 6+ . . . nothing you can do! I have even had a miscarriage at 8-10 weeks that took several hours - went through all stages of labor - it would have been totally unnecessary to add the stress of being in an ER during that time. She did nothing wrong!! She didn't blow it off. Ridiculous. So tired of people making mean comments!

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    4. If you had gluten intolerance or celiac, you would understand that the symptoms in terms of cramping are quite similar to those of a miscarriage. It is natural that she thought that was the problem first. All it takes is one iota of gluten and you are in horrible pain.

      When someone has a miscarriage sometimes there is more than just blood. Perhaps she didn't want to broadcast the details.

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    5. 7:53AM: Lauren saw more than blood. I had an early miscarriage, at 8 weeks, and I passed the whole embryo in the amniotic sac, and the little spine was very visible. That's probably what she saw. I went to the hospital after that, and they sent everything away for testing, but they also tested me to see if the miscarriage was maybe caused by an RH problem, in which case, I would've needed a shot of antibodies (gamma globulin)

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    6. Medical staff can’t stop a miscarriage that’s happening. What would you prefer her to do? Go toa hospital and have to pay a medical bill just so a dr could tell her, “sorry, nothing I can do. Here’s some $350 ibuprofen for the cramping”?

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    7. What part do you not understand? From my experiences, the really painful cramping happens right before the baby is expelled. The doctor can't stop it from happening, and it's painful enough that you don't want to be sitting in an er or doctor's office while you're going through it. If she had never gone through a miscarriage before and had a plausible explanation for the cramping based on her past experience with eating gluten, it makes sense that a miscarriage wouldn't be her first thought. Someone who goes through something like this deserves compassion and understanding, not judgement. It sounds as though you are not really trying to understand, from what you're saying.

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    8. What else should you do at 6 weeks? What medical attention is needed?

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    9. You did miss something "I went to the restroom and there was the baby,gone" she saw that the dead fetus had fallen out that's how she found out she miscarried,she did'nt go to a doctor because she thought she haf eaten something with gluten,poor thing the got such a shock when she seen what happened,it was a tough time for her.

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    10. 2:05 -- I'm so sorry!

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    11. It can happen quick. It's a good idea for her to call the dr.to explain what happened and set up an appointment to make sure everything is out. When I miscarried I wasn't supposed to go in until the bleeding stopped. Then I got checked and everything was cleared out and ok to try again.

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  5. Their whole family could have helped Lauren through this whether or not she had already told them she was pregnant. She didn't have to do that on-air pregnancy reveal only to have to then explain on-air, in graphic detail, what happened.

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    1. If you think any Laren said was “graphic” then you must live a very sheltered life.

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    2. I saw her in several interviews online & on TV and I also thought she went into too much detail about the blood and the bathroom and all that. It was not suitable for children or sensitive people to hear. Not everyone wants such details.

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    3. They were excited about their news. There was no reason for them to think that it would end in a miscarriage so why would they wait to tell everyone? There was a perfect opportunity with both of their families together to share their news.

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    4. She is young. It is understandable that she was excited to share the news of her pregnancy. And, also since she is young, she probably does not know many other women who have had miscarriages. She is in shock. Some people deal with tragedy by talking about it, others do not.

      Her whole life was geared to getting married and have children. Since they believe that it is God's will if you have a child, I can imagine how more difficult this miscarriage must be for her.

      The fetus, for whatever reason, was not viable. When I had my miscarriage, that gave me comfort. It was just not meant to be. Other than seeing her doctor to rule out any preventable causes, there is nothing else she can or could do.

      I wish this young lady health and peace.

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    5. 7:19, “blood” is not a bad word, if you as a parent don’t want your kids hearing about what happens when someone has a miscarriage then you shouldn’t be letting them watch an episode where you know someone is going to talk about their miscarriage.

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    6. 10:49AM Try explaining to kids why they aren't allowed to watch a particular episode of the Duggars. You'd still end up in a conversation about things that are too mature for kids to hear. What about sensitive women who've had their own miscarriages and don't want to be reminded of the particulars or the visuals, either?

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    7. If you are "sensitive" then you must not want to ever be a comfort to a family member who has cancer or surgery or any problem. I remember one patient at the hospital where I work who had colon cancer. One day he told me he wished he had a heart attack and I was horrified because his cancer was treatable and he was doing well. He explained that no one in his family wanted to hear about it because it was uncomfortable for them to talk about the bowels and his colostomy bag. No visitors. That is what you sound like when you post such awful comments.

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    8. 7:54 Nobody should be forced to hear about or watch something they don't want to. I won't watch animals being hurt or mistreated on TV. I won't watch shows with gun violence. I won't watch shows with medical procedures. I won't watch anyone having needles stuck in or blood drawn, not even myself. That doesn't make a person horrible. You're probably desensitized to those medical things because you work in a hospital but you should have the ability to understand how others feel about them, given the nature of your job.

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    9. 4:20, that segment was at the very end of the show, any parent who didn’t want their kids to see that part could easily change the channel.

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    10. @4:05 Guess you didn't see all the "coming up" segments the week before and during the show. "Why was Lauren sad?" would have been on any kid's mind, seeing that.

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    11. Children can’t know about miscarriage and death? Strange.

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  6. Jessa had better learn to keep her cupboards cleaned out and routinely check the dates on food in there. Old baking powder is one thing, but imagine pulling out expired food and not checking before feeding it to your family. The fact that she had baking powder so out of date makes me wonder what else is lurking in her kitchen...

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    1. Oh brother - it's none of your business what is lurking in her kitchen lol!. Yes, one should be careful but the dates are usually a suggestion and many say "best by" not "use by". Baking soda is just fine! I'm sure she uses all of her senses in determining if a food is okay regardless of the date. The comments people make just are astounding - so petty!

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    2. Old baking soda isn’t quite the same thing as feeding your family moldy spinach or something. Come on. And also, I’m gonna guarantee something has expired in your kitchen. Watch that plank in your eye.

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    3. She doesn't bake very often. I've found things in my cupboards that I don't use often and had to throw them out because it was old. That doesn't mean that we don't pay attention to the rest of our food.

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    4. You'd think that if a film crew was coming to watch you bake, you'd check your ingredients ahead of time so you wouldn't be made to look foolish on TV. Or maybe the film crew brought that ancient can with them and put it there on purpose??

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    5. 9:01 -- Haven't you ever pulled a rarely used spice out of your pantry and smelled it, to find that it's lost it's potency? She just doesn't bake very often

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  7. I'm not trying to diminish Lauren and Josiah's loss, but why on Earth would anyone that knew she was pregnant blow off such an obvious symptom of trouble as cramping as "something I ate"? They should have gotten in the car and high tailed it to the ER when the cramping started. I wish them well but they didn't make a very good decision regarding medical care IMO.

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    1. It sounds like it happened relatively quickly. There really isn't much they can do in an ER to stop an early miscarriage.

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    2. Trust me when you have gluten issues, or even some other food sensitivity, it's very difficult to distinguish if something is really wrong or just something you ate. If you are not anticipating any issues your mind normally does not jump to the worse case scenario.

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    3. Going to the ER would have done nothing to stop the miscarriage.

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    4. Well this isn't opinion - as someone who has had 6+ miscarriages I know first hand there is nothing that the ER or your obgyn can do other than say you are probably miscarrying . . . even if you call your doctor's office regarding spotting and cramping they will tell you that you are possibly miscarrying and they are more concerned with how much blood you are losing and will want you to monitor that. One of my early miscarriages (8-10 wks) went through all of the standard stages of labor, at home, . . . nothing can be done to stop it. When it comes to the Duggars, must we always be so negative about them? If only we could all do everything as perfectly as all of the negative commenters on this blog must do.

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    5. You don’t “hightail it” to the ER for cramping. There’s nothing they would have been able to do there. My mom had three miscarriages and many of my friends have gone through them, if you’re early in your pregnancy a lot of the time they’ll have you just let the baby pass at home, or they’ll do a D&C. They didn’t do anything wrong, and I’m assuming since Lauren’s mom was there they did call a doctor who probably told her to come in in the morning if she was still cramping so they knew she may be losing the baby, or that she could just be feeling sick and that’s why they had her come just in case. don’t make judgmental comments on tings you obviously don’t have much understanding for.

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    6. Because is her first pregnancy and she is young and didn't expect to be having a miscarriage. Even if she did go to Emergency straight away, they wouldn't have been able to do anything. You can't stop a miscarriage. If she was beyond in 20 weeks (in Australia) it would have been classed as pre-term labour so providing there is a heartbeat they would be able to give medications to prevent labour from occurring. But especially before 12 weeks there is simply nothing any doctor can do.

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    7. I have celiac and have had a miscarriage. The pain from eating something with gluten was 10X worse than the physical pain of my miscarriage. So no, she wasn't blowing it off. When you have celiac or gluten intolerance, you are used to people giving you something you thought was safe and having hours of pain afterward.

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    8. And what would the doctors have done for them once they got there?

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    9. You can’t stop a miscarriage, even if you hightailed it to the ER upon cramping...

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    10. What is the ER going to do for her? Maybe confirm that she's having a miscarriage, which she figured out for herself without having to undergo an expensive ER experience. I have had 2 miscarriages and going to the ER was never a thought in my mind. You just get through it and then see your ob/gyn for a follow up.

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    11. You obviously haven't experienced a gluten allergy.

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    12. There is very little if anything the ER could have done at this stage of pregnancy.

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    13. I’m guessing she’s had the same symptoms when she’s ate gluten in the past and assumed this time was no different. I find these comments insensitive, we do not know if she reads this blog and the comments or not and I would hate for her to think that having a miscarriage was her fault because she didn’t go to the doctor.

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    14. Because she had gotten cramping before when she mistakenly ate gluten and that's what's what she thought happened again she is gluten intollerant,it all happened so fast they did'nt have time to drive to a doctor,believe me they would have done if it was'nt too late
      , didyou not see how distraught she was.

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    15. Lauren said that she doesn’t eat gluten because it causes her to cramp. She thought she had eaten something with gluten in it, so obviously she wasn’t worried right away. It is always easy to second guess what someone else should have done.

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    16. The cramping from too much gluten and female cramping feel exactly the same to me.

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    17. I haven’t seen this episode yet as we are a few weeks behind in the UK, but believe me @anon 9.16, going to hospital with an early miscarriage does nothing to prevent it happening. It’s actuslly worse sitting for hours in an A&E department full of other people while your in pain & probably passing blood. In my opinion I think Lauren did exactly the right thing by staying at home with the people who love her & could support her. Medically I do hope she got checked out afterward, just to make sure non of the uterine contents were retained as this can cause infection later. However as a midwife I have had many young women in early pregnancy ring into ante natal clinic with cramping within the first 10 weeks & all are told to stay at home & see what happens. Most who do go on to suffer a miscarriage do come to clinic the following day & have a thorough gynaecological exam. This poor girl does not need negativity from anyone. Please try & be kind to a young woman who isn’t even 20 years of age yet. To loose a longed for baby (& clearly Lauren very much wanted this child), at any age is dreadful, but in someone so young it can be very very traumatic. I personally am glad her mum was with her at this time & not strangers in a hospital waiting area.

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    18. You didn't address the elephant in the room. Due to the high costs involved with seeking medical care, Americans make decisions regarding care that people in developed countries with universal health care find troubling. We're pretty much trained to find reasons why we don't need to get medical care.

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    19. 10:36, I think that’s a bit dramatic.

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    20. She would have stayed at the hospital all night and would have been told there was nothing they can do to save the baby. The smart thing to do is go to the Dr. To get checked to make sure everything came out.

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    21. 12:19, you obviously have never had a miscarriage. Even if you do go to the hospital they don’t have you stay over night.

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  8. Let get this straight. None of them like or eat cake, they don't plan to have a groom cake at the wedding so they have a cake baking contest. Makes about as much sense as some of the other things they do for the TV show.

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    1. Then stop watching for goodness sakes!

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    2. But they were intending to have a groom's cake when they did this, and then decided afterwards not to do it, right?

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    3. Here we go again, "fans" telling other people to stop watching. Like the show is only for "fans." If I had to agree with or be a fan of everything I watched on TV, then I'd never be able to watch the news or the weather or the commercials or even the election returns.

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  9. Lauren's miscarriage story is heartbreaking. God bless them!

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    1. It is heartbreaking, and then to have people jumping on her for how she handled it makes it worse. So many people lacking in compassion these days.

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  10. My heartfelt condolences go out to Lauren and Josiah. Prayers being said

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  11. A very sad story. I'm a little concerned that Lauren didn't recognize the cramping as a sign of a serious problem with the pregnancy and head to the hospital. They seem to be coming to terms with the loss and I do hope they can have another baby.

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    1. You obviously don’t have a gluten allergy and have never had a miscarriage. #1, the pain from a gluten allergy is EXTREMELY painful, so Lauren wouldn’t have been concerned about having stomach cramps for that reason. #2, there is nothing you can do to stop a miscarriage, so there would be no point in going to the hospital. They just tell you to monitor your bleeding.

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    2. That would be even worse passing the baby whilst in the car travelling to hospital.
      As has been reinterated numerous times above - nothing can stop you miscarrying - nature has to take its course and best place is in privacy of your own home allowing some dignity.
      Obviously on rare occasion you haemorrhage afterwards then you need to seek medical care immediately.

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  12. My heart breaks for this young couple Leuren and Josiah. I did miscarry the very first pregnancy, seeing them so excited and then everything shatterd is so sad, it brought back memories and how dark following days were. I got pregnant very quickly afterwards and have healthy son, but I keep thinking how hard this experience is. And yes, 1/4 early pregnancies ends in miscarriage, often followed with healthy pregnancies but heart ache is real. You feel lonely, sometimes you want to talk, sometimes you want silence. It's tough experience for young marriage but I believe Josiah is doing very well, me and my husband grew really strong as couple in that sad time. Lots of strenght Lauren, you are not alone in this

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  13. I don't live in the US so I don't quite understand what's exactly a groom's cake. Can someone enlighten me ? Thanks !

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    1. Sometimes there's a small cake in addition to the main wedding cake. It often is a flavor that the groom prefers and possibly decorated to reflect his interests.

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    2. 7.51pm I'm confused why did the grooms cake need to be gluten and sugar free for Abbie if John & men were only going to eat it??

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    3. The grooms’s cake isn’t just for men. Anyone can have a piece if they want to.

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    4. I think the groom's cake is kind of a "Pinterest" thing. I had never heard of one and then, after everyone started using Pinterest, I saw them everywhere online but not at any weddings I've ever attended. Is it a southern thing? I live in the upper Midwest.

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    5. 7:36, they were having a normal cake at the wedding for the guests, and thinking about having a grooms cake for Abbie and any other guests who can’t have gluten.

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    6. I got married when Nixon was in office and there were grooms' cakes back then. They're not new. It's a cake with a design supposedly of the groom's choosing, displayed off to the side of the tiered wedding cake, and it's cut and shared during the reception.

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    7. Might be a southern thing. I had one at my wedding 43 years ago in Texas.

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  14. So we have another display of how inept the Duggar girls are in the kitchen. I've come to the conclusion that only Anna knows how to cook and she wasn't involved in this "contest" to make cakes that none of them even wanted to eat because they don't like cake.

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    1. Never heard of a family that does not eat cake. Jessa not having a mixer is very surprising. Maybe not one on a stand but a little hand held mixer.During Jana's turn I am pretty sure I saw food scales on a shelf behind her. Who writes this stuff???

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    2. to 9:41 pm. My husband's family never eats cake and none of them have ever made cake. I made cupcakes for them once, a month into meeting them as I thought everyone liked cupcakes but they were confused and kept calling them muffins and weren't sure whether to put them with the main meal or with dessert (it was a buffet).

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    3. I think all of them knew how to make cakes except Jessa. They just had not worked without sugar/ gluten. It changes the texture and taste. At least they tried to make something their new sister in law could eat.

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    4. I am all but certain that every Duggar wedding registry so far has included a stand and/or a hand mixer. Even if the registry didn't, it's still a standard wedding or shower gift for someone to give. Where Jessa put hers is anyone's guess.

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  15. "Let them eat cake" -- as long as it's gluten and sugar free. lol

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  16. The Great Duggar Bake Off. Jessa won with 3 year old baking powder. This reminds me of the time they made meat balls and forgot to put any seasoning in them. lol

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  17. The baking portion of the show might have been better if limited to a 5 or 10 minute segment. It was cute although tedious to watch.

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    1. I know! It felt like it was half the show, and then..."we probably won't have a groom's cake anyway." This was one of the worst episodes.

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    2. Agreed, 7:28.

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    3. I enjoyed this episode. Not everybody likes cooking shows, but they are a popular genre. I liked it because it went into detail and was thorough across all the teams. And the review was done nicely by John and Abby. It seems there could have been a bit more emphasis on Josiah with Lauren and the story of their loss. My sympathies go out to them.

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    4. Oh my gosh yes. It was so tedious and boring!!!

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  18. Many prayers for Josiah and Lauren as they heal from their loss! They seem like a wonderful couple. I am enjoying other family members being a part of the show. I have baked and decorated many cakes. However, I have never made a gluten free and sugar free cake. Seems like they all had a fun time with this groom's cake activity!

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  19. I have had 4 miscarriages, so unfortunately I know the situation well. For those of you who say she should have gone to the hospital with the cramping, there is nothing they could have done for her. They cannot stop a miscarriage from happening. This way, she was at home with her husband instead of in a hospital with medical professionals telling her how “normal” miscarriage is. Just pray for her and for the many, many, many women out there who have experienced this same loss. It is not easy and it takes a log time to heal from.

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    1. I beg to differ. I had a miscarriage that started with cramping. It turned into a major blood loss. Had I NOT gone to the hospital when it started I would have died. They couldn't stop the miscarriage but they could do something to save MY life. When you have a medical issue like a miscarriage, staying at home is not a good choice.

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    2. Anonymous 6:58 that is entirely dependent on the situation. I have had 3 miscarriages. The first I went to the hospital but should have just stayed home. The second was an ectopic so I was sent to the hospital but only for an injection to kick start my miscarriage. The third was my worst but I was more then able to handle it at home. Miscarriage does not mean automatic hospital visit.

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    3. For the vast majority of women, getting medical attention during a miscarriage is not necessary. That does not mean there are not exceptions, as in your case, but it is not normal medical practice to be seen when having a miscarriage.

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    4. 6:58, I’m sorry that was your experience but most doctors will tell you to stay home unless you start bleeding excessively, so thats what they would have told Lauren.

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    5. Anonymous 6:58, 99% of miscarriages that occur at a very early stage need no medical intervention. I'm sure if Lauren had experienced any serious symptoms she would have gone in for medical care right away. Your situation was unfortunate but not typical.

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  20. I don't really understand why you would require the groom's cake to be sugar free and gluten free? Most people wouldn't care for a cake of this type. Instead you could make a few cupcakes for the bride and make the cake how everyone else would like to eat it.

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    1. Or, since it was the Grooms cake; the bride does not have to eat it!

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    2. Good point. You'd think that they would want a cake that their GUESTS would enjoy and not tailored to two people's dietary wishes.

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    3. A lot of people choose to eat this way. And it is their wedding so if they chose gluten free sugar free desserts for the guests to eat, then that is the decision that is made. Perhaps they just need to keep working on the ingredients and recipes. My family can’t tell when I bake gluten free/sugar free. I’ll just serve cake or cookies with no mention at all about what kind of ingredients I’ve used.

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    4. It is their day and out of respect guest shouldnt care what is provided.

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    5. I'm tired of brides and grooms declaring "This is my day!" and then making their guests do or eat absurd things. Good hosts make their guests' comfort a priority and work their own desires around that. It's the hosts that should show respect first.

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    6. Anon 5:38. It may their "day" but most people who have invited guests to share their day try to provide food that will appeal to the people they invited. They don't inflict their food fetishes or dietary preferences on others.

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    7. Oh, for Pete's sake. You all are forgetting or purposely ignoring the fact that the groom's cake is only a secondary cake to the wedding cake (or bride's cake). No one is depriving the guests of wedding cake. If some of the wedding party or guests have dietary restrictions, then making the groom's cake for them sounds like a sensible and thoughtful thing to do. You in fact want to deprive those people who cannot (not just don't want to) eat regular cake, if you follow what you're saying to its logical conclusion.

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  21. The show was good . I love how the little kids was in the show last night. MY sympathy goes out to Lauren and Josiah . May God will bless your union with a little one soon. May God comfort you as u go through this season. LOVE THE SHOW. Natasha G

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  22. I had always enjoyed the Duggar shows - going back to when they had 14 kids.
    They had a couple of episodes that I thought were in poor taste. . grandpa Duggar funeral - did we NEED or WANT to see him in an open coffin. . . and then when JB & M had the burial of their stillborn Jubilee as an episode - a simple "In Memory" would have let fans know of their losses.. . . They are big on sharing news taht MOST of us would consider PRIVATE. I too extend my condolences to Josiah and Lauren, but again all they needed (if anything) was to say "we sadly inform our fans of their loss."

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    1. There was absolutely nothing wrong with Jubilee’s episode. If you had a problem with it you shouldn’t have watched.

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    2. The episode about Jubilee's loss did include things I probably would have kept private (photos). Some things are for family only.

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    3. 1:39, they showed photos of her hands and feet, there was absolutely nothing wrong with that. She was their baby, and all of the pictures they shared were very tasteful. It was not your decision to make and there is no reason for you to criticize theirs.

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    4. The questionable aspect of Juilee’s episode and funeral is it was clearly all staged for filming. Michelle has miscarried between Josh and the twins; she and JimBob did not name him then or give him a funeral/burial. However, with the miscarriage of Jubilee; they named their first miscarried baby Caleb.

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    5. 5:10 -- I remember that they had named him Caleb long before Jubilee. I could be wrong.

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    6. Anon 5:10. They named the baby from the 1st miscarriage "Caleb". That is really odd since all their other children have names beginning with the letter J. Almost like he wasn't really one of their offspring. Who knows why they made that choice.

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    7. 5:10: they named him Caleb way before Jubilee, we don't know if they had a burial for Caleb (but probably not if it was an early miscarriage), and "clearly all staged" is not "clearly." We don't know what they would have done if they weren't filming.

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    8. @5:10No they did not ever name the first miscarriage baby until the Jubilee miscarriage!

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    9. They stated LONG ago that they named their baby Caleb, because he was carried after their firstborn whose name is Josh. Joshua and Caleb coexisted in the Bible. As Michelle said it YEARS ago, “Joshua and Caleb ran around with each other, so we thought it’d be neat to name this baby Caleb.” The J theme didn’t emerge until John and Jana had J names, and they went from there. But again, they named the baby Caleb 30 years ago upon his passing.

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    10. 2:26, Caleb was only their second baby, so they hadn't decided on a J theme yet. Caleb and Joshua were biblical characters, so they chose Caleb to go with the Joshua they already had.

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    11. If folks knew the Bible, they'd know that Caleb and Joshua were the two men among the twelve sent to explore the promised land who came back and gave a good report. Therefore, they were the only two of the Israelites who came out of Egypt who were allowed to go into the promised land, and were chosen to lead the children of the rest over the Jordan. It makes sense that if your first child is Joshua, your second would be Caleb.

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  23. Lauren's willingness to be open about this terrible experience is why I love the Duggars. Their purpose from the beginning has been to encourage others and I feel as if sharing the hardships of life does just that. Through their tragedy, Lauren pointed us to Jesus, just as Michelle did when they lost Jubilee. Thank you, Lauren and Josiah, for sharing your story.

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    1. Couldn't agree more! The duggar family's goal has always been to minister by pointing people to Jesus and encouraging us in everyday life. Lauren's story will help and encourage so many other young moms who are dealing with this too.

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    2. It's one thing to share that you've experienced pregnancy loss, but I really don't think viewers need to be provided with the graphic details. It just brings out the keyboard warriors with all their accompanying medical "expertise."

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    3. 8:01PM: I agree!

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    4. I hope Lauren wasn’t forced to be filmed and share this heartbreaking event.

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    5. 5:11, nothing they do on the show is “forced”. Lauren SAID she wanted to talk about it. Just because it’s not something you would do does not mean it was the wrong choice for her.

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    6. @12:15. How in the world do you know “nothing they do on the show is forced?”

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    7. Anon 5:31. I'm not sure "forced" is the right term to use for what Lauren did. She was expected by the Duggar family (and possibly her own) to make this segment for the show. Somehow the TV show has taken over their lives and she had to talk about the miscarriage no matter what.

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  24. Some of these comments illustrate why it's not always a good idea to publicly share intimate or graphic details about a personal experience, in this case a miscarriage. It just leads to more questions and conjectures. You have those asking why Lauren didn't do this or that, was she really even pregnant, etc. I think it better just to state the fact that there was an early miscarriage, it was a difficult time, and leave it at that. Save the nitty-gritty details for family and friends if you must, but keep it simple for the TLC viewers and everyone else. The way this was filmed for the show looks like it was primarily for ratings, which is a shame to use a personal loss in this way.

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    1. Nah. Some of these comments just illustrate it’s not always a good idea to be a busybody, demanding more and more info from total strangers in order to satisfy some desire for drama.

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    2. Haha, people guess and conjecture no matter how much or little they share.

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  25. These ridiculous cooking contests are pretty much "fillers" when there's not much else going on. There seem to be no new courtships, engagements and weddings in the offing and no new births to show. Oh well the Duggar girls can display their lack of skills in the kitchen and everyone is happy.

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  26. Everything has to be gluten free? Then Abbie and Lauren wouldn't have been able to eat the loaves Jesus used to feed the crowd. They would have been able to eat the fish though.

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    Replies
    1. I don’t think celiac disease was a thing back then.

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    2. I'm pretty sure Jesus would have provided everyone with food they could eat.

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    3. Gluten isn't as healthy as it used to be. Plus there are those of us who honestly can't eat it.

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    4. Gluten allergies are a relatively new thing for many people. Something's going on in the environment/food supply.

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    5. Celiacs cant have modern wheat. The grains from Jesus' time was dramatically different. This is best illustrated by people who can not eat American wheat products but can go to Italy and can eat traditional pasta.

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    6. Anon 6:39 So Jesus wouldn't give the crowds stuff Lauren and Abbie couldn't eat. That's good to know.

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    7. It doesn't work like that. If JESUS gave them bread, they would have been able to eat it.

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    8. If Jesus realized that not everyone can eat his bread, he would go to Safeway and get a gluten free one!

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    9. Joel Salatin (possibly the best farmer in the world today) says that it isn’t the wheat of today that’s causing gluten issues, but it’s 1. What’s applied to the wheat during growth and 2. How the wheat has no time to ferment a little before being ground into flour. Back in the day, people winnowed and threshed the sheaves or wheat. It allowed for air to circulate and dry it, and a tiny bit of fermentation took place. Now it’s harvest, process, boom boom boom, done. Not healthy. Plus the poison Monsanto applies to everything, it’s a recipe for health issues.

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    10. Jesus spent three days healing people before he fed them loaves and fishes. Just sayin'.

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    11. 6:39 is right. GMOs are banned in Italy, so people who can't tolerate gluten can often handle it in Italy.

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    12. 6:09 -- Thank you. That was very informative!

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  27. Loved when jana said, glad i am not gluten free. Me too, jana!!

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  28. I thought it was very courageous of lauren to speak about their tragedy. Maybe it was therapeutic for her. She is a very sweet girl

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    1. Her emotions and tone seemed very angry. She’s so disappointed and sad. I think she was put up to sharing this painful event. I,also, believe they were pressured to annouch their pregnancy ASAP.

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    2. It was obviously therapeutic for her. She expressed her pain. Not sure that you can call an early term miscarriage a tragedy. It's an embryo that is not viable.

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    3. If Lauren needed to talk about so it was therapeutic, she should have done so with a counselor. The Duggars seem to think that talking into a TV camera is the same thing.

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  29. the baking segment was one of my favorite episodes ever. I laughed the whole time

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  30. I loved the baking part of the show. It was very entertaining. I love these girls.

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  31. Maybe some of these perfectionist on this blog need to show the girls on this show how to be perfect. I'm sure that none of these negative commenters have ever made a mistake

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  32. It is so sad that some people come on a Christian family blog to tear people down. Or I should say try to tear people down. This family finds their worth in Christ alone and these judgmental comments do not hurt them one bit. They probably don't even read them

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    Replies
    1. It's a blog about a family who happens to be Christians. But not everyone who visits here is Christian, which is the way the world is so that shouldn't be a surprise. And even Christian families do everyday things that people have opinions about. Most posts and discussions here don't even include the Duggars' religion!

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  33. I love the cake baking competition. I have also tried making gluten-free and sugar-free and it is very frustrating

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  34. The cake baking was a learning experience as is everything else in life. I guess all the negative commenters have never failed at anything at all?

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    Replies
    1. No. But most of us don't go on national TV and somehow can't follow a recipe. Every time the Duggars have one of these "contests" no one can do anything without a bunch of problems.

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  35. @3:35. You're so right. We're jealous of not knowing how to bake, not having the right ingredients on hand, not owning a scale or a mixer, not knowing Fahrenheit from Celsius oven temperatures, and producing cakes that nobody wants to eat. How ever did you guess?

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  36. Furst, I am so sorry for your loss. I know that it is a hard path we sometimes have to walk. If you do see this, when you are ready you might want to see and OBGYN who specializes in women with autoimmune disorders. It was a gave me great information with my fertility and my celiacs. You are in my thoughts.

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    Replies
    1. That's a good idea. Since Lauren has a known food allergy it probably does have an impact on any pregnancy she has. I hope she realizes that and will seek advice from a specialist.

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    2. Absolutely! You’d think her own mother would have advised her!

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    3. A food allergy is far more complex than "I'll just avoid that food, problem solved". Lauren has an underlying medical problem and I'm not sure she's getting any advice to help her deal with it. Her mother just had her 9th child and is busy. The Duggars all appear to be very healthy so they'll probably not be able to understand the issues involved. Perhaps Abbie might be a good resource as she's a nurse and has some similar issues. I've had zero support from my family as I struggle with my chronic fatigue syndrome as they are all very healthy and don't "do" sickly people. I wish Lauren all the best.

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  37. I enjoyed this episode. It was a welcome change from the courtship/wedding norm. Of course it was staged by the producers but who cares - it was fun.

    Now to the people who are questioning why the grooms cake (and other food in general) should be gluten free allow me to explain. For those with certain genetic susceptibility, a tiny morsel of gluten - a mere crumb - can trigger a huge cascade of documentable changes in the small intestine. Your immune system recognizes gluten as an invader and unleashes an full scale attack which damages healthy cells and causes pain, cramping and a myriad of other symptoms including fatigue, headaches, et cetera. Long term, with chronic exposure, can be disastrous - leading to all sorts of physical and cognitive consequences.

    It's not something to make fun of. Consider yourselves fortunate but please don't throw stones.

    If John were to consume his grooms cake and then kiss Abbie - she could very well have a reaction. So for someone with this difficulty it's best not to risk cross contamination - especially on her wedding day!

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    1. I believe Abbie said she removed gluten from her diet on her own since she was having stomach issues. While it’s possible she has celiac syndrome I don’t think she’s been diagnosed with it. Many, many people don’t consume gluten, but if you ask them why it’s bad they can’t give an answer. It’s the trendy thing to do. Lauren, on the other hand, seems to have been diagnosed.

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  38. It is sad about Lauren's miscarriage because her love story with Josiah was just perfect -travel to Australia, engagement, being on the show, wedding, honeymoon in Europe... However, she is so young, she will have more children for sure. Also so many woman have early term miscarriages, it is very common. Would be much more hurtful to have a miscarriage at 14-15 week when baby is more developed. Erin Bates had I think 3 miscarriages, and now she has 3 wonderful children. Anna Duggar said she had a miscarriage at very early term before Mackynzie. Look at other reality TV shows - Catelynn, Maci from Teen Mom, Paola, Karine from 90 Days Fiance. It happens.

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    Replies
    1. Anna actually had a miscarriage right after Mackenzie, not before. And being young does not mean that you’ll get pregnant. My moms best friend was married very young, got pregnant quickly after, and then lost the baby shortly after that. They were never able to conceive again after that, and could never find out why.

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    2. My husband and I started trying for a baby at 26. I was never able to conceive naturally and no cause was found. I didn't think we were too old.

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    3. Anon 2:56 PM But Lauren conceived! That's a good sign, it means that they can conceive.

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    4. I think they took the miscarriage so badly because things were working out for them so well all the time.

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    5. Just because OTHER people had babies after a miscarriage is no guarantee that Josiah and Lauren (or any couple for that matter) will have babies in the future.

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    6. This is true. I had two miscarriage, ten years apart. One boy nad we don't know what the other baby was. And I still named both babies. Levon is my oldest in heaven, and Antonio John is my youngest in heaven.
      Mommy loves you

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  39. I'm sure by the end of this season Lauren and Josiah will announce that they are pregnant again!

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    Replies
    1. Even if they get pregnant again they might not be eager to announce it. This whole thing has been very difficult for them.

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    2. Some people are able to get pregnant quickly after a miscarriage, and for others it can take years if ever. Posting that you’re sure they’ll get pregnant again is rude.

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    3. @11:38-I think the whole event taught them patience....hopefully taught TLC patience as well.

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    4. Anon 12:10 PM Posting that they'll get pregnant again is positive and optimistic, not rude.

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    5. I do hope for that. Being infertile can be painful but being infertile in a such baby-oriented community would be way worse.

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  40. I think it was a fun idea to do a gluten-free sugar-free baking contest to show how difficult it is to make something that tastes good with those restrictions.

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  41. 3:35- Here's the thing- Whoever is coming up with these absurd episode ideas is really inviting the belittling. It's almost as if TLC is oftentimes purposefully trying to present the family in a negative light.

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  42. I think that some of these things like the Bake off and hot sauce competition are pretty silly. I'm not sure why the Duggars engage in these activities as it does present them in a way that makes them look foolish.

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  43. 7:56, I agree. It does seem that TLC tries very hard to make these young people look foolish. I think Jeremy is wise to what’s going on as he’s made some snarky comments during the silly question sessions.

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  44. Anyone else get the feeling that those broken & stuck eggs were planted in Kendra's fridge, on purpose, by TLC?

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  45. So Jana can bake bread with no problem but she can't make a cake. This whole contest where no one could make a cake successfully was another one of TLC's fillers.

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    Replies
    1. Bingo 1:47. Jana can bake 20 loaves of bread at a time but can't follow a cake recipe. Uh-huh TLC...

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    2. They do not bake gluten-free foods at their house. Baking bread is not the same thing at all. If you baked gluten-free, you'd know it's a lot more complicated.

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    3. Anon 7:06. Baking bread is far harder than baking a cake. You have to do a LOT more with when making bread. All you have to do with a cake is follow the directions on the recipe and put it in the oven.

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    4. Anon 7:06. After looking at the recipes for several gluten free/sugar free cakes, they are the SAME as making a regular cake from scratch. I don't see anything "tricky" or "complicated" in any of the recipes I looked at. You just use gluten free flour instead of regular flour and some sweetener other than sugar.

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  46. These cooking episodes leaves me with the feeling these young women have way too much time on their hands.

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  47. That's why they advise women not to announce their pregnancy before 12 weeks or so, because there can be any complications and miscarriages in the 1st trimester. It's not something unusual.

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  48. Yes 1:33 - who has a camera crew coming over to film you baking a cake and you fail to have the right ingredients on hand? They set up lights and cameras, they get your relatives over, they do your hair and make-up, but all you have are a few broken eggs????? There is less and less reality in this reality show.

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  49. Food allergies are terrible. Poor Abbie and Lauren can't take Communion because the bread would make them sick.

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    Replies
    1. There is communion bread available now that is gluten-free. There is no reason that they can't partake of Communion. My Grandchildren have celiac disease and can participate.

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  50. Anon 1:33. Yep. Most people check the cartons of eggs to see if the eggs are OK before buying them. lol

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  51. I think that TLC is catering just as much to Duggar critics as they are to fans. That's why they film these painful scenes and the Q & A sessions. Whatever brings in viewers, even those who are watching for a train wreck.

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  52. Since the cakes were made to suit Abbie's dietary needs, they must have thought SHE was the groom.

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  53. Anon 1:33. It had to have been staged. I thought the Duggars got their eggs from those chickens Jana has and she wouldn't have given Kendra broken eggs.

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  54. Anon 4:30. Exactly. The people on TV cooking shows always have all the ingredients for whatever they're going to cook. It wasn't like TLC just showed up with a recipe and told them to make it.

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  55. Anon 12:01. I'm getting the impression that Jeremy is growing tired of being on "reality TV". I wouldn't be a bit surprised if he follows Derrick's example and pulls the plug on TLC.

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  56. Since the duggars are very pro-life does Lauren consider herself a mom? If somebody’s asks her if she has kids will she say yes?

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