Monday, December 19, 2011

Update: How are the Duggars Coping?

The Duggars are drawing closer as a family as they mourn the loss of 21st child Jubilee Shalom. While Michelle is getting plenty of rest (thanks to Jim Bob and the kids), she has by no means checked out. Even during this painful time, she is in the midst of her children; showering them with love, sharing in their tears, and joining them in prayer.

"[Jill] was crying and weeping last night," Michelle told People Magazine at Wednesday's memorial service. "I hugged her and said, 'I am holding on, and I am going to let the tears go. We can pray, cry and grieve together in the weeks and days we walk through this.' "  

"Our calendar is cleared off, and we are going to take time to talk and pray and cry," says Michelle. "This is going to be a time for our family to just be together."

But one thing that the Duggars are not erasing from their agenda are their December birthdays (all five of them). Turning another year older may not seem like a big event in such a large family, but no birthday goes unnoticed in the Duggar home. Josie celebrated her milestone second birthday on December 10th, Jordyn turned three yesterday, Jinger enters adulthood on Wednesday, and twins Jedidiah and Jeremiah become teenagers on December 30th.

37 comments:

  1. God's ABUNDANT blessings to you all as you walk through your grief. We have a son in Heaven, too...it will be 12 years ago on Tuesday, December 20th, and Stefan would have been 17 a couple weeks ago. You never stop wondering what they would have been like!!! Stefan prayed for 2 baby sisters before he died, and he got them 7 1/2 months later, plus 2 'bonuses' in 2005, and in 2007. We are blessed to be the parents of 7 children, 6 whom we are still raising, and 1 who is living in God's presence. We can't wait to be reunited one day when the Lord calls us!!! Please know that you have prayer support and love offered up for you all!! God bless!! Laura, from Canada

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  2. What remarkable strength & faith!God Bless all of the Duggars & our family continue to lift you in prayer. And Happy Birthday to all the December Duggars!
    Brenda

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  3. The Duggar's closeness as a family will see them through this sad time. As they draw closer to God and each other they will find comfort and peace.
    I wish them all a very happy Christmas.

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  4. I thought it was the 20th child not 21??

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  5. What a beautiful name for your beautiful little soul. Sending you comfort and hugs during this holiday season.

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  6. Sorry for your loss God be with you all . Remember the negative remarks are just foolish people that does;nt understand God You have a wonderful family that God has blessed you with I'm sure little Jublie will be missed by all of you. But just remember God needy her more Bless you all and hope you all will have a MERRY CHRISTMAS

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  7. Hi Anonymous! (at 7:27 AM)

    Including Caleb, the baby that Michelle miscarried after Josh was born, Jubilee is their 21st.

    Thanks for reading!
    Lily and Ellie

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  8. Poor Jackson. 7 is such a hard age to experience something tragic. Old enough to know something is going on, but not old enough to fully understand. After reading of Jackson's experience, no one can say that a baby conceived, but not yet born is not a baby. My heart also goes out to Jill. I imagine she felt the most emotionally connected to Jubilee, other than her parents, because of hearing her heartbeat and the medical attention she was giving her. I do hope that she does not feel partially responsible, like she should have done more. That is a heavy and needless burden to carry. I included the lyrics to the song "The Reason for the World" in the sympathy card that I sent the Duggar family. Here are the lyrics:

    There are no words in times like these
    When tears don't hide the tragedies
    And all you want is a reason for the world

    No comfort in the greeting card
    Cause God is good, But life's still hard
    and your heart just wants a reason for the world

    Maybe the reason for the pain
    Is so we would pray for strength
    And maybe the reason for the strength
    Is so that we would not lose hope
    And maybe the reason for all hope
    Is so that we could face the world
    And the reason for the world
    Is to make us long for home

    For God so loved your broken heart
    He sent his son to where you are
    and he died
    To give a reason for the world

    So lift your sorrows to the one
    Whose plan for you has just begun
    And rests here in the hands that hold the world

    Maybe the reason for the pain
    Is so we would pray for strength
    And maybe the reason for the strength
    Is so that we would not lose hope
    And maybe the reason for all hope
    Is so that we could face the world
    And the reason for the world
    Is to make us long for home

    Well I know your past the point of broken
    Surrounded by your fear
    I know your feet are tired and weary
    from the road that you walked down here
    But just keep your eyes on heaven
    and know that you are not alone
    remember the reason for the world

    No ear has heard, No eye has seen
    Not even in your wildest dreams
    A beauty that awaits beyond this world
    When you look into the eyes of grace
    and hear the voice of mercy say
    Child, welcome to the reason for the world

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  9. The Duggar family are truly a blessing. They show that even when the worst can possibly happen to a family (Jubilee being still born) that they can overcome the sorrow and find something good. The faith this family shows is extraordinary. May GOD find you comforted in this time of sorrow, Jubilee is among the angles now. God Bless.

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  10. Jim Bob and Michelle, and family,
    We are praying for you through this time. We just know that sweet Jubilee is with Jesus and her name tells of who she is in Him. You all are a blessing and a true example of the love of the Lord.
    May the Lord bless you and give you peace.

    Much love,
    The Glover family

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  11. I also feel so bad for Jill since she was with her mom and dad when they found out that her sister was in Heaven! Jill is such a sweet and kind person and will make a great nurse someone I would have as a friend! I feel bad for the younger kids as well that don't yet understand whats going on yet! The family is in my prayers and thoughts!

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  12. Even through this storm. The family has remained faithful to God, and each other. I applaud that. I praise God for this family's strong example of what a Christian home should look like ,it is truly inspiring. My heart goes out to the Duggars. God Bless all of you!
    -Tina

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  13. I know this is noting compared to what all the others have said on this blog. Life ....Life is so taken for granted and we are never promised tomorrow. I value life so much and having children has been the greatest moments in my life. I say Thank you Duggers. You are leaders in ways other do not know or understand.So many are selfish and want the material things in life. Teach and others will fallow. I can not wait to have another child because they are blessings and our choice is life. Thank you again and never give up.

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  14. I am sure in the months to come the Duggars are going to have to answer some very hard questions why they never have until this last "miscarriage" included the baby way back when that was miscarried in their baby count. In fact, the show should already be called "20 kids and counting" and now it should be "21 kids and counting." I guess because they felt like they caused it with birth control is why they denied and ignored and forgot about poor little Caleb for so many years--the Duggars are God, you know, or at least they think they are. Pride cometh before a fall and I see a huge fall happening here trying to explain why this is their 21st child and they omitted one along the way. I have no doubt this will not be published, but somebody will read it!

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  15. So sad to hear about your loss. Taking photos of your precious little one is nobody's business but yours. I thank you for the photos...they are truly beautiful and make me wish I had done the same.

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  16. Praying for all the Duggar family!!!

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  17. Bless you and your family this holiday. Thank you for sharing your beautiful pictures of Jubilee! How very sweet. It is a wonderful memorial. I so so very sorry for your families lose. What a sweet little angel.

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  18. Dear Duggar family...love and prayers as you journey through this time if grief after the loss of your beautiful Jubilee baby. I know you will all see her again someday in Heaven, but until that day, I pray the Peace of Jesus will carry you through. My twin sister, Rebekah, founded a Christian infant loss ministry/support group called M.E.N.D. That provides comfort, help, & hope to those who have lost babies...perhaps you could visit the website & browse the newsletters, stories, & resources. Just as my sister created a beautiful legacy through the very brief life of her stillborn son, Jonathan, I have no doubt the LORD has a magnificent legacy already planned for your sweet baby too...in fact your amazing letter to her & photo is already ministering to thousands! God bless you & thank you for being a wonderful example of Christ to the world through your tv show. Rachael McClelland
    Www.mend.org

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  19. Thoughts & prayers for the Duggar family. May you be blessed with peace & comfort this Christmas.

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  20. I have no doubt that they always loved Caleb, but Jubliee made it much further into development. She was stillborn, visibly a girl, and Michelle was far enough along to have felt movement. It was too soon to know Caleb's gender and too soon to feel movement when they lost that child. It makes sense to me that after Jubilee they would also start including Caleb in the count. Caleb was just as much their baby as Jubilee. They were able to cradle Jubilee but not Caleb. Caleb was a pregnancy that was lost. (I don't think he/she has a gavestone.) Jubilee was somewhere in the middle. She wasn't able to draw breath on this earth, but her parents were able to hold her. I don't think they did anything wrong by not including Caleb in the past. I don't think they are doing anything wrong by including him and Jubliee now.

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  21. Every child deserves to be loved. In your family from what I have seen they are, this baby will just be love in heaven instead. God bless and keep you all.

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  22. Thank you to the beautiful people commenting on this blog that aren't calling this sad loss a wake up call, a lesson for the Duggars, something they have asked for, a platform for a politcal statement, among other insensitive comments. While I could or would never have that many kids, I respect their right to that choice and think they do an awesome job as a family. Millions of kids in this world would give anything for the love that the Duggars have.

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  23. I am a mother of two miscarriages. I commend you on how beautiful the pictures I have seen are and how your video, letter an service for precious Jubilee was. You are not alone, for there are many of us who are thinking of you an praying for you as well. My heart goes out to you. Stay strong, stay together. Jubilee is a BEAUTIFUL NAME and she's a precious angel in heaven's playground. I hope my girls welcomed her with open arms. in my thoughts an prayers. CarrieAnn

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  24. Why are they naming a dead child did they get to hold jublie and whos caleb all j names right

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  25. Jennifer Webb From Indiana -- My deepest sympathy to you and your family through your grief. I have lost a son from stillbirth who would be 13 in April and a daughter who was premature who would be 11 years old in March. I later went on to have two premature girls who both lived. I pray for your family.

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  26. What are the duggars doing for Christmas?

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  27. I want to say how incredibly sorry I am for your loss of your precious Jubilee. My thoughts and prayers are with you, all the way from Brisbane, Australia.
    I had a similar experience 11 years ago, when I went along to my 16-week check-up blissfully unaware there was anything wrong, and discovered my baby boy had passed away. I know that one day I will be with him again in Heaven.
    Again, I am so sorry you have this terrible pain of losing your precious baby. Prayers and hugs. xo

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  28. Hi Anonymous! (at 3:55 PM)

    The Duggars were able to hold Jubilee, and they took pictures of her hands and feet. Caleb is the child that Michelle miscarried after Josh and before twins Jana and John-David. That was before they started the J-theme.

    Thanks for reading!
    Lily and Ellie

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  29. God bless you all with His unending mercy and grace. The Lord is all knowing...He has reason for what has happened..even if we do not understand why. I have five children myself...two teens and two twin infants. I lost my first child. Only God knows why...but Jesus is holding your precious little baby girl and mine. Love and blessings to you all....Karen Foster, Plano TX

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  30. I just posted a second ago about Michelle stating that she had twenty children, but I went back and listened to the recording and she did say "twenty-one" . I was wrong. Please don't post what I said. I was mistaken. Sorry. I thought she said twenty. Ooops.

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  31. I am very sorry for your Loss I feel your pain for i too have lost a child before ,It doese not matter how many children you have, to lose one is so horriable .My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family God Bless you

    Ramona

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  32. Hi Anonymous (at 6:31 PM on Dec 20)

    The Duggars have Christmas dinner with family and do a gift exchange. Details to come in tomorrow's post.

    Thanks for reading!
    Lily and Ellie

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  33. As a mother who loss a set of twins when i was 6 months along. I feel your grief. I feel like someday with god i will get to be with my lost baby's. It has been 14 years in Feb but i celebrate their birthday with my other 5 kids. I love what you stand for. Keep strong and our prayers are with you and your family. Lots of love Jenny from Minnesota

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  34. I still say the Duggars have a whole lot of explaining to do as to why they were (are) "19 Kids and Counting" and Jubilee made it 20 Kids and Counting, when if they count Jubilee and honestly believe life begins at conception, why weren't they already 20 Kids and Counting...meaning counting Caleb? Because they didn't believe Caleb was viable because they "caused" his miscarriage? There are people out there that will bow down to a frog if the frog convinces them the frog is worthy of bowing down to. The Duggars are frogs. Caleb has been forgotten all these years, but now all of a sudden he is remembered..."Oh, THAT one! I forgot about THAT one!" The Duggars have 21 children if you believe life begins at conception...they have 20 if you believe a life was not a life if you caused it to die due to birth control.

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  35. God bless you and your family. We pray that the Lord will give you peace that surpasses all understanding. You are an encouragement to us and your encouragement helps us to help take care of children as foster parents. Thank you for the wonderful blessing that you and your family are! We are praying for you! Love, Mom of 4 lil ones....

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  36. I am so sorry for your loss. I think your family is just so sweet. I pray for healing for all of you. Someday God will reveal his reasons, we just have to trust him as hard as it may be at times. You are such an inspiration to so many people on how to be loving to one another and put God first. Me and my husband just have two kids and we have such a hard time being kind to each other. You are all truly blessed in this way! I think that people have an initial reaction to hearing about a family having so many kids (its like ppl are afraid we're going to run out of food or something!) but its amazing how many people have grown to love you guys! I really think its impossible to watch your show and not have your heart softened even if you have a sour opinion going into it. Ill be praying for your family and your sweet baby Jubilee.

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  37. @AnonymousTo Anonymous said....14 The Duggar family has never forgotten Caleb. Michelle and Jim Bob have mentioned him in why they don't use birth control. They said they micarried a precious child to misscarriage after Josh and prayed and thought about it and left it in God's hands when they have a child and how many.

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