Friday, November 27, 2015

The Duggars' Live-In Tutor

Many of you have been asking why Tabitha Paine--older sister of Erin (Bates) Paine's husband, Chad--has recently appeared in a handful of the Duggars' photos.

In this picture, taken last winter during a trip to Braum's after watching the Arkansas Razorbacks win a big game, Tabitha is the gal behind Jackson Duggar.

Jessa Seewald, Ben Seewald, Jedidiah Duggar, Tabitha Paine,
Jeremiah Duggar, and Jackson Duggar

Some have guessed that she is in a courtship with John-David Duggar, but that is not the case.

Tabitha took to her family's website to share why she has been spending so much time with the Duggar family. She posted this comment in response to a gal who asked if she is in a relationship with Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar's second oldest son.

So glad you asked! It’s easy to assume and few people branch out to find the real answer to questions like these. I have been a live-in tutor to the Duggar children for the past year. Because we don’t do school 24/7 I am able to join in with the family’s work, and fun activities during the weekends and evenings. Hence, the reason why you may see so many pictures! But, I am in no such relationship. I may just be single for the rest of my life
 

I sure do enjoy where God has me, and want to do as Jim Elliot encouraged: “Wherever you are; Be all there”! Blessings!


Photo courtesy theseewaldfamily.com

72 comments:

  1. I wonder if John-David has thought about courting/dating anybody? He is older now. Does he live at home? He is never in the photos. Maybe camera shy. People are always asking if or who the Duggar girls are courting, but nobody asks (or bugs) the boys.

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  2. A shame there is no courtship between John David and Tabitha. They look like they would make a nice couple. I understand John is shy, but maybe alittle confidence could help. If they could spend some time alone, I wonder if that would change their minds. I hope they have had the opportunity to explore if they are compatible and could be more than friends. I still have hope for these two.

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  3. That is totally inappropriate. It is wrong for a girl to live with this family or any family that is not hers. The Bible tells us to abstain from anything that could give the appearance of evil or sin.
    The proof of the point I am making is that people assumed she was the girlfriend of one of the
    boys. By having her live with them, they are putting temptation right in front of their sons. I find
    this amazing in light of what has happened with Josh. I am actually scratching my head at
    this revelation.

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    1. Well the Duggars did let Jessa's boyfriend move in before he even proposed. So this isn't as bad. Since Tabitha isn't dating a Duggar boy it should be ok. They just got to keep an eye on it.

      Also I think it's good for Michelle to get help with the kids if she needs it.

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    2. I find theses comment offensive to a sweet girl just doing a job, but you can't help it when there are people out the with dirty minds Even if she did go on a date with one of the boys to get to know them better there is no harm in it. Very often a cup of coffee is just a cup of coffee.

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    3. Strange thing Tabitha has same shape face as Jessa and is very pretty looks like a Duggar.

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    4. Oh puhleeze... I'm sure that she is in a very safe situation.

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  4. Very nice and such a lovely girl. Certainly makes sense as the help was needed with older girls growing up and marriage.
    Hope people appreciate her inner beauty and gifts and lay off the courtship queries.

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  5. What did the Duggars do for Thanksgiving this year?

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  6. Why do the Duggars need a live-in tutor??

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    1. The older girls where there teachers. As the family grows/ changes, the younger childrens needs changes also.

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  7. I wish I could push the thumbs up. It's so nice to find young ladies that make good role models instead of the half dressed people that are all over the t.v. I think it's great your following God...:)

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  8. What happened to Michelle teaching the children? Has she given up with the job?
    Joan,Marion and Marilyn

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    1. If you ask me the older grls did quite a lot.My mother had 10 children,my father worked out of town weekly.My mom did it all when I see one of the older girls getting up to help one of the little ones in the middle of the night sick. All I can think is Why not their mother..Very sad she has the kids then the kids do all the work .Not right.I only see Michele over see it all WOW

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  9. Seems like a delightful young lady. I am sure that she is a blessing to the Duggar family helping with the kids school work. Also shows that we should be careful about jumping to conclusions.

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  10. Why aren't M & JB teaching their own children?

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    1. Do you teach your own children, or do you send your kids to school?

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    2. I teach my own children at home and although I only have four, it gets crazy at times. I do not hire a tutor.
      I home schooled in high school myself and needed tutors to make it through certain subjects. But I went to their homes a few times a week.
      I just think MICHELLE should play a big role in home schooling her children.

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  11. I counted only 16 children in the picture and was wondering where the rest of them are?

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    1. There all there .. I counted

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    2. there are three above the Blogger title with Michelle and Jim Bob and Josh and Anna and their 4 kids.

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  12. The pic looks photoshop to me. Her face is so much smaller than the others and her arm just doesn't seen in the right position with the guys ice cream cone.

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  13. Does Michelle not homeschool?

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  14. What a wonderful young lady. Great comment from her - though she is not in a courtship with a Duggar boy she seems to be a great catch - only God knows the future!

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  15. I don't know exactly where to post this question, but I'm hearing rumors that Jana and Jinger are engaged. True or false? If true, to who?
    Also where do I get accurate Instagram account info on Jana and Jinger? They are my faves

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    1. I would also love to know if Jinger is dcourting Lawson Bates and if Janna is courting anyone

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  16. Can Michelle not handle homeschooling the kids herself?

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    1. Given the large amount of children I guess she needs help?
      I think it's great the Duggars are squashing the courtship rumors but admitting that michelle ( and the older girls) are not the only ones who do all of the homeschooling in thier house ONLY because tabitha set the record straight brings out a sin of omission. It's no big deal to have a tutor for your kids but why was tabitha never given credit?
      The Duggars give advice on homeschooling when they go out and do conferences and I wonder if they advise on live in tutors. ?
      Again. Nothing wrong with having help with homeschooling a large family but it seems michelle takes all the credit.

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    2. Do you send your kids to school? It's not a bad thing to have an extra adult around!

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  17. Why in the world do they need a tutor?

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    1. They quite often have people who know more about a particular subject teach the children. Michelle ' s older girls are moving out or working. Why are people acting like this is such a bad thing? It's not. It doesn't mean that Michelle isn't teaching her kids! Having a tutor is not a bad thing. Having someone else to teach, maybe in a different way, is a good thing. Expands the mind.

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  18. When they had Josie Jessa took over a lot of the schooling so Michelle could be at the hospital. I think Michelle got used to a little bit of freedom and wants to continue it. Not that she does nothing, I'm sure they keep busy with appearances at conferences all over.

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  19. Jana and Jessa took over much teaching when Michelle had Josie, with the weddings, babies and joshs issues im not surprised at all that they have a live in tutor. Kudos to the duggars

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    1. I home schooled both my boys and they are both well up in the medical profession now. They both went to university as soon as the time came and I di employ tutors who specialize in subject which I needed help with namely sciences we knew they wanted to go to medical school so this was the way for us to achieve our goal.

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    2. Well done,it can be done and the kids can be useful members of society glad to see this.

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  20. Unless you homeschool you don't understand how much work there is going into it. Two of Michelles older daughters got married and moved out, this is probably why a tutor was needed. This does not mean she's a bad mom at all. I homeschool 1 and need help at times. I just don't understand why everybody has to nitpick everything. ... "why don't they do it their self" or "she looks to small, look at her arm and her face" people in sure you are fare from perfect this is not only rude but heartless to talk negative like this. Just give thanks they have friends willing to be there. Gezz what has the world come to?

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    1. EXACTLY :-) You hit the nail on the head.Instead of finding fault with everything/post, why not find the beauty and joy in everything instead...I promise you negative Nellies, your soull will feel lifted, give it a try.Blessings and Godbless:-)

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  21. Why WOULDN'T they need a tutor? I think a lot of the people questioning why Michelle would need help homeschooling all her kids have probably never homeschooled before. It takes a lot of time to give each child the attention their education deserves.

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    1. Yes exactly! I only homeschool two and it's very time consuming. I don't know how I get through the day half of the time

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  22. All of you who posted the above questions obviiously do not homeschool your own kids. The older girls often helped with the youngers schooling. With so many of them gone and off doin their own things it woudl be very helpful to have an extra person to help with the schooling to keep everyone on track and make sure eveyone gets the attention they need.

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  23. This doesn't make sense. Why does Michelle not homeschool the kids? And Michelle and Jim Bob were supposed to speak at a homeschooling conference, so you'd think they would be the ones doing the actual homeschooling.

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  24. I believe Jill and Jessa helped with the home schooling of the other children. She may be replacing their help.

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  25. It could also be she is educating in an area the Duggars are not as familiar with and thought outsourcing would be a better option. Im sure with all the added pressure of the past 12 months on their family Michelle and Jim Bob have been busy helping all members of their families with things and this way having another hand to help means they young kids education does suffer

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  26. It could be that Tabitha Paine was looking for a paying job and the Duggars offered. I doubt Michelle can't handle the teaching.

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  27. Sounds like she moved in around the time when Jessa moved out. Did she also take over Jessa's buddy group? I've been wondering what happened with the buddy groups when Jessa got married since she didn't have anyone in her group to take over like Jill/Joy did. Hope you can explain this!

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  28. I only homeschool two kiddos and I think the Duggars did well to hire someone. It makes sense that there would be greater oversight of studies, etc.. There is only one mom to go around- give them a break!

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  29. I am sure they are grateful for extra help with that many children on different levels! I have just two that I homeschool. There are many times I wish I had a little help. Good for them for seeing and meeting a need for their children!

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  30. People are just so judgemental and rude. I've home schooled when I only had 2 in school, and it is very challenging. Seriosly are yall asking why she needs a tutor. Good grief

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  31. Why are people having such a reaction to a tutor helping with home schooling? Good grief!

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  32. Why the comment about the photo being "photoshopped", it clearly shows Ms Paine holding her wallet/handbag. This is a fine family who has experienced some unhappy drama this year....prayers of support for God to reveal the beauty in these ashes.

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  33. Live-in tutor? It's great for Tabitha that she gets teaching experience. Does she get paid wages or is it free room and board and little pay? I remember when Michelle taught 12-14 kids at once all by herself minus the music lessons back when they had their once a year tv specials. Now there are only 11 kids doing homeschool, and those in grades 3 and up are doing online school with SOS. So, why does Michelle need help homeschooling?

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    1. I was wondering this also. With no TLC series and contracted filming schedule, no babies or impending pregnancies, less children to school, and using SOS, why the need for a tutor now? Heading off personal attacks like some of those above, we've home schooled for 11 years. I have homeschooling friends with 11 children (2 of them autistic), living very frugally on a single income. They have no tutor, nor anyone coming in to help with laundry. The older children are not regularly expected to act as surrogate parents-assigned and responsible for their siblings care (dressing, instruction,getting them into the vehicle to leave, watching them, etc.). The mom teaches them, not the eldest children. The mom and dad are responsible for managing their children and their daily and outside activities. You can't be but so in touch with your children,if you have a lot of children and you're filming/writing books/conducting seminars and interviews instructing others how to raise their children/making appearances, and flying to South America. I believe Jim Bob and Michelle love their children. I think the last thing the Duggar children need is less time with their parents though. Jim Bob and Michelle are old enough to handle all the upheaval; their children are not. It might be wiser to stay home and tend to the affairs of their own household, guard their childrens' hearts, and get some family counseling from a certified Christian counselor. All of the siblings have been emotionally damaged and impacted. Their priority should be their own children. Spending 15-20 minutes individually with a child each day (or even an hour) is not enough.

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  34. I could see Michelle needing help if she had a ton of little ones or when Josie was in the nicu, but she really doesn't need a tutor at this time. If she was able to homeschool like 10 at one time I'm sure she can do it on her own right now.

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  35. I think the reason there is such a fuss over having a live in tutor is because such a thing is considered a luxury for the average household, much less for a household of 21. And this is where the message is no longer relevant. When the duggars were first on tv, they attempted to show how such a large family can survive on an average household income. In doing so, they showed how they DIYed a lot of basic necessities, from school, clothes and food to laundry detergent. They worked hard by doing a lot themselves and purchasing secondhand. Fast forward to today, where the show has made the duggars very wealthy. It's apparent that they now enjoy a much less frugal lifestyle. For example, they no longer make their own detergent, they live in a large house and own a lot of other properties, and they eat out a lot more than they used to. While something such as eating out may not seem that much to an average household, for a family of 21 that can put a huge dent in the family budget. And while there is nothing wrong with enjoying the lifestyle they now have, they are no longer relevant to your average American household. It no longer makes sense for them to tell their fans that following suit in their lifestyle is feasible when your average family cannot afford their lifestyle. The point of contention here is, any other mother in Michelle's shoes could not afford a live in tutor and would have to bare the responsibility herself.

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    1. I could not have said that better! Thank you :)

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    2. You are exactly right! We only have 4 children, I homeschooling them, and my husband has a stable and comfortable salary. We have to stretch every cent in order to live without debt. The Duggar children, each flashing thousands of dollars in straight smiles, is something our family will never be able to afford, despite having dental insurance. I just cannot understand how modest families can see much in common with the Duggar family. Heck, I know we cannot afford the cable to even watch their show!

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  36. No shame in hiring help when you need help. But since the Duggars go on so many speaking tours, giving advice about how to homeschool large families, they need to be honest about the fact that they are not able to do it without help. Many families that go to these conferences have a large number of children. It would be sad to have them follow all of the Duggar homeschooling protocols and then feel like failures when they are unable to do it. Seems like the Duggars need to be more honest.

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  37. I would love to hear more about how homeschool works for the Duggars now since a tutor is a change from how they explained it before. I read the comments and I would assume Michelle is still teaching since the state has rules that a parent must be in charge of homeschool or a certified teacher. Tabitha must just be helping as a tutor not a teacher? Are they using a new program, maybe one Tabitha knows more about or used herself? Is it correct there are 8 Duggars left in homeschool now? Michelle said kids finish at 16 and 11 kids are 16 or over now (wow how times flies).

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  38. I thought the law in Arkansas was that no other than a parent could homeschool their kids. I hope i am wrong, i wouldn't like seeing the duggar family in trouble

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  39. From: http://www.arkansased.gov/public/userfiles/Learning_Services/Charter%20and%20Home%20School/Home%20School-Division%20of%20Learning%20Services/Home_School_Law_2013.pdf

    " "home school" means a school provided by a parent or legal guardian for his or her own child." So, the Duggar's are conducting a legal homeschool because the law does not specifically state that the parents' have to be the teacher, just that the parents have to provide a homeschool.

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  40. Some people need to mind their own buisness!

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  41. #43 - It's a gray area of the law...

    Question: Can a grandparent or someone other than the parent home school a child?

    Answer: The letter of the law says that a home school must be conducted primarily by the child’s parent or legal guardian. No court rulings exist that clarify to what extent other individuals can be involved in teaching a child enrolled in a home school.

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  42. I never saw such a mean-spirited group as those who follow this blog. You call yourself CHRISTIANS? I don't follow any organized religion, and I'm far less judgemental of what the Duggars do or don't do, when it comes to educating their children, because it's NONE OF MY BUSINESS. Tabitha was hired by the Duggars. Means nothing other than they can afford help, and they got it. That's all. Stop backstabbing the very family you all profess to love so much.

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  43. I see a lot of judgement here. I work in a school and I also tutor small groups of students outside of the school hours. Sometimes students need more help or a different approach. It's not a reflection on the teacher. A good teacher knows when to seek more help and does what is needed to meet the needs of his or her students. All we know is the tidbit that was shared here. Really, we're lucky to have that. Good for them for recognizing what their children need educationally.

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  44. I need a live in tutor and I don't even homeschool mine. Aha

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  45. I don't get all the noise about the Duggars homeschooling their children, or the fact that they hired somebody. I mean really the kids are getting educated why are they being criticized for that? please just think of all these people that aren't taking care of their children, do you know how many people that are not taking care of their kids education or
    In any other way for that matter.
    I like these people they've been through a lot this year and God has really brought them through it. I miss them off of TV but they probably won't be coming back. but anyway god bless them all.

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  46. @Anonymous She is 30 not a girl. I get tired of hearing grown women called girls. In a recent article she says she may single all her life. I hope this is truly what she wants. There's Anna not even 30 with 4 kids. Jill and Jessa arent even 25 and have one kid.

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  47. I am a big critic of the family but I am actually going to give Michelle the benefit of the doubt for a moment. Did anyone ever think that Michelle may be struggling personally about the scandal that started in May and the second wave of scandal a few months later? I know they are trained to only be pleasant etc but if Michelle is down in the dumps because of this I would understand and I think many others would too.
    Every since TLC money started floating in the biggest heartbreak was Josie (I had premie twins as we'll and you just can't fall apart) but this is a different thing all together. The collateral damage that Josh has caused goes very deep. Michelle is dealing with her son in dire straits, being sued, losing his job, his wife and four small kids moving in Michelle's house, unsuccessful interview with Megan Kelly and much backlash, her daughters having to deal with being outed as victims, her other smaller kids asking questions, losing their tv show this losing their jobs, appearances etc. I am not a fan of Michelle but unless she is a robot she HAS to have serious aniety or depression about all of this

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  48. I hope they pay well jon&kateplus8 were paid $75 grand an episode I hope those girls don't feel pressured to have babies just for the money why not just send them to school unless you need the money from the homeschooling conferences?

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