Tuesday, May 1, 2018

Duggar Courtships


Josiah Duggar and Lauren Swanson
 Josiah Duggar and Lauren Swanson

On our Bates blog, we posted a list of the Bates daughters' ages when they started courting. Our readers asked that we make a similar list for the Duggars. Here it is below, a list of each of the kids who has courted publicly, as well as the age they began their courtship.
 
Jill: 22
Jinger: 22
Joseph: 22 
Jessa: 20 (2 months before 21st birthday)
Joy: 19 (1 month after 19th birthday)
Josh: 19 (approximately)
Josiah: 18 (Marjorie); 21 (Lauren)

Photo courtesy duggarfamily.com/Josiah Duggar

90 comments:

  1. Can you make a list of how long each person courted?

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    1. This would not accurately indicate how long there relationship was because they have a close friendship stage before they start to court and this is never made public.

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    2. Good idea! I'd like that, too

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  2. What no josh?

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    1. Look again, he’s there

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    2. He is not on the show (and with good reasons). So he should not be mentioned.

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    3. He is on the list

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    4. Josh is there

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    5. If Josh can’t be mentioned then neither should anyone who has ever made a mistake.

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    6. 2:11, not all mistakes are created equally. Cheating on your wife is a big no go.

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    7. 1:32 -- Yes, adultery is 100% wrong, but so are other sins. Gossip, for instance. Read what the Bible says about the damage the tongue can do.

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    8. Hmmm... When one seeks forgiveness God puts that sin "as far as the east is from the West". He's been forgiven by God and his wife. In God's eyes his sin is no more. When people keep bringing up others' forgiven past that is a sin.

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    9. In God's eyes all mistakes are created equally. It is only man who qualifies and says cheating is worse than a lie or murder is worse than something else.God says they are all sins and HE forgives them all the same. Also he cheated on his wife it is for her and God to forgive or condemn him not us.

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    10. Anon 1:32 but God sees ALL sin equally

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    11. We live on Earth, among people, not in Heaven. We have to have standards of behavior and different repercussions for different bad behaviors. If not, then stealing a pack of gum at age 10 would mean you got sent to jail with adults who have murdered. We have to handle crimes (and sins) differently or life here and our society would be a total disaster. And remember, what Josh did had an effect not just on his wife. Look what it did to his entire family...his job and co-workers...the show...any other men on that dating website, when it was outed...the court system that tax payers fund... No man is an island.

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    12. Also this is a Duggar family blog, not a TLC or Counting on blog. Josh is and always be a member of the family.

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    13. 8:31- Sorry, but I don't. The law doesn't either.

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  3. Didn't Josh court another girl before Anna?

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    1. I know Zach Bates courted before Whitney on their first show but I’ve never heard of another courtship for josh.

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    2. No, you're thinking of Josiah.

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    3. It wasn't an official courtship, but there was another girl he was interested in before Anna.

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    4. Zach Bates courted Sarah Reith, before Whitney. Sarah broke it off with Zach as she didn’t feel it was God’s leading.
      Sarah Reith was very recently engaged but it didn’t end in marriage, they have broken up. Sarah and her 3 siblings have a musical group and tour. The 4 sibling group is called Southern Raised. Their family was featured on the Duggars show when they helped build the addition onto the bates family home. The Reith’s played music on the front porch in that episode and they are talented musicians.

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  4. What do you mean when you say "the kids who courted publicly"??
    Was there courtships we don't know about because they were not public ?

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  5. I thought Josh and Anna started courting at 18? They got engaged and married at 20 and it was said that they had been courting about 2 years at that time.

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    1. Hi there,

      Josh and Anna met in 2006 (2 years before they married) and became family-friends, but it wasn't until early 2008 that Josh asked Anna's dad for permission to court Anna.

      Lily and Ellie

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  6. Thank you for including Marjorie in this post. So many people forget she courted Josiah first. She was sweet, wish we could have gotten to know her more.

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    1. How do you know a lot of people forget about her?

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    2. It was a very brief courtship and should be left in the past now that he is courting someone else. If you were Lauren I’m sure you would appreciate it if Marjorie wasn’t brought up repeatedly.

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    3. If couples can't talk about their past relationships openly (in an effort to be honest with their partner) then there is a problem Kathy.

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    4. As far as Marjorie, both parties have moved on. No need to hear about her. There was never an engagement. I agree with Kathy Borders, I think Lauren would appreciate it if she were not brought up repeatedly.

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    5. Most teenagers and people for that matter have other boyfriends and girlfriends before marrying. It's a bit ridiculous to think that a past girlfriend can't be mentioned because it will hurt the delicate feelings of a teen bride.

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    6. I think it's important to have Marjorie on there to show that a courtship may not work out. Josiah and Marjorie placed God at the center of the relationship, looked for his guidance, and determined that they weren't meant to be husband and wife. Young people should know that courtship doesn't always end in marriage and it's not a shortcoming to end a relationship. Marjorie was an important person in Josiah's life and they were a Duggar courtship.

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    7. ITA Anon at 11:13AM. If Lauren gets hurt every time someone mentions Marjorie, then IMHO she's not mature enough to marry.

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    8. I agree Anon at 8:36PM. The Duggars get enough accusations of covering up what doesn't show them in a perfect light. That a courtship doesn't always end in marriage is a truth that shouldn't be ignored. That doesn't mean we should bring Marjorie up in every Josiah topic. But this wasn't even specifically about him, more about Duggar courtships in general.

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  7. When is Kendra due? When Is Jinger due? When is Josiah's and Lauren's wedding?

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    1. Kendra is due June 17th 2018, Jinger is due July 20th 2018, Josiah and Lauren's wedding date is currently unknown.

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    2. June. July. May

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    3. Kendra is due on Father’s Day, Jinger is due mid July, and Josiah and Lauren are getting married in the summer

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    4. Kendra is due in June. Jinger is due in July. We still don't have a date for the wedding.

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    5. Kendra due in june n jinger due in july also no one know when weddin for josiah n lauen yet

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    6. Kendra is due June 17, Jinger is due mid July, and they haven't announced Josiah's wedding date. They usually don't announce it until after they're actually married :)

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  8. “19 (1 month after 19th birthday)”
    Typo?

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    1. no typo, that is correct. in other words, joy was 19 yrs and 1 month, whereas jessa was 20 yrs and 10 months

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    2. No just turned 19 idk how that would be a typo

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  9. Lauren is 18..

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    1. The 21 is referring to Josiah's age, not Lauren's. The only ages listed are for the Duggars, not the people they courted.

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    2. Oh okay. Thanks.

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  10. Anon at 1035AM: While the Duggars don't "date" that doesn't mean these courtships begin out of the blue. The Bates have shown "special friends" on camera months before an official courtship is announced. They showed a lot of footage of Bobby, Evan and Kelton months before the official courtships started.

    The Duggars don't do that, but that doesn't mean such pre-courtship periods don't exist. They were hinting during the first Joe/Kendra wedding episode that Josiah would be next to court, several months before he and Lauren made an official announcement, so I assume she was already in the picture. I also recall seeing glimpses of Jeremy months before he was officially introduced.

    So I wouldn't be surprised if there have been relationships that never got beyond the pre-courtship stage that were never televised. But I recall Michelle making a comment once about her daughters crying on her shoulder about boys they liked.

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    1. Looking back and watching old episodes, especially weddings, the next to court people are shown helping. Austin and Kendra were helping with Jinger's wedding. Lauren was shown in Joe's wedding footage. Jeremy was featured prominently in Jessa & Ben's baby shower as one of Ben's friends.

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  11. Hi Lily and Ellie! Thank you so much. I was wondering what their ages were when they courted but was to embarrassed to ask.

    Thank you

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  12. thanks for the details - interesting :)

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  13. Kendra's due date, is on Father's Day. Jinger's due date, is a couple of weeks, after that. Josiah and Lauren, have yet to publicly announce, their wedding date.

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  14. I would not have included Marjorie in the Courtship Lists. Too many people bring it up. It would bother me if I were Lauren. It happened; it didn’t work out; end of.

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    1. It is interesting, though, from the perspective of wanting to know how old they are when they start courting.

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    2. That's the way it should be.

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    3. Just because something didn’t work out doesn’t mean you forget it or erase it from history! Plus it was on TV. No hiding that.

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    4. You can't erase history. This is an "historical" list of courtships.

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    5. Of course you can’t erase it but it doesn’t need to be held up for contemplation. It’s rude to all parties concerned. Let it go!

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    6. If any woman is offended and hurt by the mere mention of a prior girlfriend in the “courting” category is way, way to immature for marriage. Marjorie was (and is I’m sure) a lovely young woman. My husband and I have had lots of talks about previous boyfriends and girlfriends as each one taught us something more about ourselves. Both of us were in serious relationships prior to meeting each other, with myself seriously considering marriage. For various reasons it did not lead there, and I then met my amazing husband. However, we both have fond memories of previous boyfriends/girlfriends and a few are still family friends. It would be silly to pretend these people did not exist or try to avoid them at reunions. Jealousy is just not our thing.

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  15. I’m hoping/ praying Jana will be the next to court and first to break the 19-22 age range. She is so awesome and I know she will find a great Christian man for her 😊

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    1. Jana might not want to get married.

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    2. That would be pretty unusual, though.

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    3. Kristen-Why should it be essential that Jana get married? Maybe she has no desire to find a husband or have children. She should not be pressured to. I don't wish something for someone when I have no idea what they truly want.

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    4. If I thought marriage meant a husband has "authority" over me, I wouldn't want to get married either, Jana!

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    5. All those posting that Jana should not be pressured or maybe does not want a husband in authority over her,overlook her upbringing. She is still treated as a minor and under her father. Getting married does not mean she has to have children but it would allow her the freedom of her own home. Plus,the girls were brought up to a wife and mother. She was not brought up to be anything else.

      Other young women her age are making a life for themselves. If they are not like her sisters,they are holding down jobs, having places of their own.

      By her age, the only authority she needs is her own authority.

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  16. I'd be glad to wear the modest clothing you are giving away in a raffle as I work in our yard. Thank you.

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  17. Is there an application to court the boys cause I’d like to volunteer myself lol heyyy jeremiah

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  18. Why include margorie...she might not appreciate it....let her go.....

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  19. Sounds like a jealousy comment. Marjorie was courted and was rightly included in the list.

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    1. I’m sure Lauren is handling knowing about Marjorie well. My husband dated others before me, and I’m okay with that. I’m the one he chose.

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    2. Your comment diesn’t Make sense. What does jealousy and mentioning Marjorie have to do with each other? Marjorie and Josiah courted very briefly, she does not need to be mentioned here or anywhere. It has nothing to do with jealousy and everything to do with respect for his current relationship and fiancĂ©e.

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    3. I’m very confused, how is that a jealousy comment?

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    4. I think that Marjorie should be included. We don't know how long they were officially in a relationship ("special friends") because the Duggars don't make relationships public until marriage is almost guaranteed. Josiah and Majorie went through the same relationship stages as the rest of the siblings who courted. It didn't work out and that's alright. It doesn't take away from his relationship with Lauren as Josiah found her a more fitting match. Even if it wasn't mentioned here, Marjorie is still his first love.

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    5. The good thing about courting (especially with chaperones) is that there is no hanky panky stuff going around. No kissing or any other intimacy so people need to get over that. Lauren is his fiancee

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    6. 4:09 -- How do you know he loved Marjorie? Did he state that at some point? Honest question.

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    7. Intimacy isn't just physical. Josiah and Marjorie had marriage in mind when they began courting after their getting to know you stage. There was a level of emotional intimacy that they reached that shouldn't be discounted.
      It's interesting that people say they Duggars courtships allow for deeper, more emotionally connected relationships and then try to say Josiah's courtship with Marjorie didn't mean anything. Courtships do fail, it doesn't mean that the participants weren't invested or didn't give away pieces of their hearts. Josiah gave away a piece of his heart to Marjorie.

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    8. 5:21, how do you know he didn't?
      The Duggars announce courtships after a getting to know you period and the courtships, save for Jessa and Ben, are fairly short. There have been Duggar courtships that led to marriage that were shorter than Marjorie and Josiah's time together. He had to have some feelings for Marjorie or they wouldn't have been courting. Also, Josiah said it was Marjorie who ended their relationship. Marjorie isn't the great love of his life, Lauren is his fiancé and will be his wife, but that they publicly announced this courtship means that there was something there.

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    9. Oh my goodness! No such thing as “giving away pieces of your heart”. My heart is fully my husbands and his is mine, and we both dated other people.

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    10. 7:18, you should talk to the Duggars. They continually talk about how non-courtship relationships lead to giving away pieces of your heart. How can a courtship, which they purport as being at a deeper, more emotional and spiritual relationship prevent the feeling of losing a love? They may save the physical aspects for marriage, but they invest emotionally in each other. The idea that they are less likely to give a piece of their heart away or are better able to remain friends with their ex is nonsensical. They entered the relationship with the goal it would lead to marriage and to walk away like it is just a person they were acquainted with lessens the idea of courtship. The whole giving away pieces of your heart is a silly concept but it is perpetuated by the Duggars to make courtship look like the better option.
      You can love your spouse with all of your heart and be fully committed to only them while still acknowledging you had a prior significant relationship.

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    11. I've never been real clear on the courtship idea and chaperone idea, or the text between the courting couple equals a more successful marriage. The way you will find the most out about a potential partner is to be able to spend time with them when no one is listening and chaperoning your date. Anyone can perform in front of a group of family but it's that date at the restaurant, or at the movies when it's just you two will you be able to see what they are really like. I often wonder if Anna would have picked up on Josh having an eye for other women if she could have seen him being his real self without family right there. Now she lives in hiding from the public with him and 5 kids. That was not fair what happened to her and to be told not to divorce but forgive and stay is her only option. Michelle would have no doubt left Jim Bob for that very thing her son did to Anna. Best to get to know this potential spouse when family isn't there.

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  20. Marjorie was in one of the Duggar’s wedding. Not sure which one.

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  21. How sad. They’re getting younger and younger!

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    1. They are not getting younger and younger! Josh was first and he was 19. Josiah is the last right now and he's 21. Before Josiah was Joseph who was 22. That is definitely not getting younger and younger.

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    2. The brides are getting younger. Joy, Kendra, and Lauren are teen brides while those who married before them were in their 20s.

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  22. Hi Dow you know whan the duggars are back on TV (t l c) I am in Ireland we just had Jo/Kendra wedding about 3weeks ago now I am a BIG fan of them thank you for reading this email

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  23. Time 9:08PM Wed 5/2/18
    That's a good idea to do this list of what age they did the courtship.

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  24. I find nothing offensive about mentioning Marjorie on this list. The idea was to list how old the Duggars were when they started to court. Josiah's first courtship was short but it was public and Marjorie even appeared in a TV show promo.

    And while I have seen fans bring up Marjorie in response to the Josiah-Lauren courtship, I don't recall the bloggers themselves doing so until this post. I doubt they were trying to rain on Lauren's parade at all.

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  25. Okay so first off for everyone bringing up Marjorie they were simply making a list of previous Courtships that was one of them like so many people have said before. but I also just want to point out that Lily and Ellie posted pictures of a little while ago about Kendra and Lauren with the family in El Salvador in 2009 to 2010. With the duggars and bates they all seem to know the families of those who court or marry in. So for everyone saying Lauren might not like Marjorie being mentioned it is quite possible Lauren and Marjorie know each other they could even be friends. We don't know (or at least I don't) but if they are friends Lauren might be fine with Marjorie being mentioned.

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