Monday, December 5, 2016

'It's not about what we have' (Michelle)

As a mother of 19, Michelle Duggar has gained quite a bit of wisdom over the years. She and Jim Bob Duggar say they are still learning themselves, and while that may be true, there is still much that the two of them can teach, as well. What do you think of this quote by Mama Duggar?


55 comments:

  1. Why isn't everything repaired and fixed around the house? We've been told that the kids can fix cars; Jana can build a treehouse, install lights, and decorate; the boys are capable of heavy labor and construction. With all that time on their hands due to no schooling responsibilities, they should be tackling every household project and have it done in a jiffy! Plus all the kids have cleaning jurisdictions, so the house should be spotless.

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    1. We are a family of 7 and I can relate to what Michelle is saying even though we have "jurisdictions" with 5 kids things always can be left undone! We don't spend all ours days cleaning and fixing everything! We still need to shower, eat, run errands, grocery shop, spend family time, take a field trip, go to church and fellowship!

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    2. That's not what is meant by this quote. It's a quote that reminds families the house is not the top priority. Of course the kids do repairs - it's in their books as well as their shows...

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    3. "No schooling responsibilities" LOL! You clearly don't know anything about homeschooling!

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    4. I think it's funny you speak of no schooling responsibilities. Obviously you've never home-schooled.

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    5. I don't think Michelle meant this literally, but figuratively. I think she speaks of how these tasks build character, not necessarily about completing the task itself. In other words, it's about the journey and discovery and not necessarily about the outcome.

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    6. Why the nasty jugemental tone? I don't understand it. Totally sarcastic. And for what reason? If you don't like the Duggars or what they say then don't watch them or read this blog. And to say they have "no schooling responsibilities" is to be completely ignorant of the amount of planning and commitment that goes into homeschooling. Wishing you and thr Duggars all the best.

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    7. Guys, the older kids (Joy and up) are no longer in school. The younger ones have a live-in tutor, so Jim Bob and Michelle don't have to do that job! Please don't pick on that person who mentioned this. You all took it totally wrong. I read it as the OLDER KIDS who have no schooling responsibilities (not the parents), of which there are plenty still around the Duggar house. In fact, they are the very ones who have been featured on the show as being so handy and helpful.

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    8. 9:28 AM -- the voice of reason, thank you.

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  2. I agree with the first sentence.
    Second sentence can be taken two ways. Not sure which direction it was meant to go.

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  3. Really, I don't see anything wrong with trying to keep your house clean and things in good condition. Maybe the Duggars shouldn't let their children play in the house like they're at the playground.

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    1. They have that playroom inside and the play area in the back yard, not to mention the fancy new tree house. But the kids have always run through the house like they were outside, even on skates and scooters. I had a rule growing up that no "outside" toys were allowed in the house, and I enforced that same rule as a parent. The Duggar children seem to have no concept of boundaries and respect for a house. Crawling all over the counters is another example.

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    2. It just means THATS NOT WHAT ITS ABOUT. Not that you shouldn't do these things. The Duggars are very routine about their children's chores, but it's not the most important part of their life. It's a responsibility- there are more important things than a clean and perfect house.

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  4. True enough, but it is nothing new. Every thinking person understands this.

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  5. Wow seems like the duggar / Bates news is quite right now. Running out of content. Any new pic/video of Joy and Austin?

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  6. I like the sentiment behind the quote but it feels incomplete. Are you sure this is verbatim what she said? It feels like there's a word or entire thought missing.

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  7. When and where is this quote from? Because it doesn't make sense in reference to their current lives.

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    1. I'm curious as to the context in which she said this too.

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  8. I agree with these posts. Yes, the first sentence make sense, as no one or nothing is perfect, but with the labor force they have at home in their children, grown and little, that house should be in excellent running order; from repairs, to cleanliness and meals ON THE TABLE. No need to live in chaos. I agree that the kids play like they are outside and have little or no regard for respecting THINGS in the house and treat them with care....ie, dirty feet, shoes on the kitchen counters and dining table, riding scooters in the house; etc. Not a good example if you ask me.
    There has been radio silence from this family for a time now. What's up. Many are asking when Jill and Derick will return to Central America and those inquiries have been ignored. Why is that?

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    1. Excellent points, 12:44. Hope you don't get picked on the way the person @ 8:33 did for pointing out those same things.

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  9. This is a good reminder. Training children and building relationships with them takes a lot of time. It's easy to start thinking that the house or the meal is most important, making our children seem like distractions getting in the way of "what is really important." We have to get our thinking back on track and put things in their place.

    Being a mom of 5 I did have to laugh at the comment about the house looking spotless because the children have jurisdictions :). The house is messier when you're training your children this way. You could do a better job placing them in front of the TV, telling them to go to their rooms, or sending them off to the neighbors. But the teaching, patience, and team effort is worth the work and the messy house :).

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    1. My friend is a mom of 6 (12 and under) and her house is spotless. It can be done. She also runs a blog and posts pictures of their wonderful, organized lives. They are not missing out on anything because of cleaning. Quite the opposite. Their lives run more smoothly and they have more free time to do things together because they don't make messes in the first place.

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    2. I wonder if any of the kids will have psychological issues in the future. I grew up in a house that always looked like a model home and now I am extremely disturbed by clutter.

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  10. How about taking it in the spirit it was intended and stop picking at every word. It is a very nice simple quote that simply means that the person is the most important thing to the Lord because in the end it is the kind of person we are that counts. Our possessions and wealth mean nothing. They won't save us or get us a place in heaven.
    It should apply to all of us and is nothing to argue about or pick apart

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    1. I disagree, 12:57. There are people who use their wealth do to a great deal of good in the world. Not the "look at us and see what we're doing" selfish type of good. The selfless, unsung good. If that isn't favorable with God, I'll eat my best Sunday hat.

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    2. 11:54, sounds like you missed the point of 12:57.

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  11. I agree. Life is more than things and appearances. We can slave away to be content with the work of our own hands, but the content of our heart is what matters most, and that often gets neglected. Tidiness and taking care of what you have is very important, but these should be a reflection of what is in our heart and not just for appearances or pride.

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  12. I think what michelle is doing is teaching the children that our character is more important. If the house is not perfect that's not the worst thing in life. She's teaching theme values and morals and how our character is what is more important than a perfect house, or car or having the laundry done in an hour. Yes a clean house an taking care of things is important. But if we don't teach our children values, morals or how to live a life that honors the Lord. Then we really haven't taught them anything.

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  13. I'm sorry, but I'm taking everything the Duggars say with a giant grain of salt. I think they've become so wrapped up in their fame at this point that they've lost touch with reality. Waiting for them to prove differently.

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    1. They do seem to be on a different plane of life now due to fame. If you watch their first episodes, the difference is startling.

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    2. Completely agree.

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  14. The quote is actually two separate quotes, though I prefer "it's not what we have in life, it's who we share it with." The word surround has also been used.

    Reference of home isn't related to actual perfection or repairs.

    It means we are human and it is unrealistic to believe life is always perfect by our efforts.

    Humans make sloppy mistakes in life and must learn from them.

    It's nice that peace can be provided by quote's and lessons to be learned but it is important to place quotation marks around and list author if publishing.

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  15. Please tell Michelle I said "thank you" for this, Ellie.
    As you know, my personal struggles aren't improving, yet this was at least a breath of fresh air right now.
    May God bless you all!

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    1. SuperJames, sorry to hear you are going through a difficult time.

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    2. Thank you for your concern. Over the past few months, I've started to consider the Duggars as my Second Family; yet after a certain #CourtshipAnnouncment, I ended up having a meltdown after reading about it. #LoveTheDuggars. #StillLoveJAD

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    3. The only person who had a public meltdown after the latest courtship announcement was a certain Bates. Hmmm.

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    4. Hmm. Would that happen to be Nathan who had a meltdown?

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    5. What are you all talking about? Was there a connection between Nathan and Joy, or Nathan and Jinger?

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    6. James, get some help. Talk to your pastor. I'll pray for you.

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    7. Anon 12:54 - No. Nathan is the second Bates to go through a "break-up".
      Anon 1:02 - Thanks. But sadly, it was actually my pastor who indirectly "hurt" me.

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  16. Very true... can we hear/see more of Joy and Austin, please???

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  17. And how did you earn what you have? How much do you share?

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    1. Who are you talking to, Jane? The Duggars, or the blog readers?

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  18. Who you really are, both when you alone and when you are with any other person, when you're under stress or everything's going great, is what is most important. Actually, who you are when everything is going wrong is the true test of your character. It's not very hard to look good with retakes, editing, and a controlled environment (shooting only what you want/will allow people to see). He who controls the information flow and image controls many things. It's more about protecting the brand than promoting the cause of Christ, in my opinion. (Let the bashing and insulting by the die-hard Duggar fans here begin...as it routinely does)

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    1. Agreed that "Duggar" is now more of a brand than a humble family.

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  19. Very good reminder for me. Who we are in spite of what life throws at us is so important.

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  20. I agree with Michelle 100%. Coming from a Christian perspective as Michelle is, you can have the biggest, cleanest house on the planet. Everything in perfect working order, etc But none of that matters. It's about living a life that honors the Lord because at the end of life we are not going to be judged on how clean our house was,if we made repairs or we allowed our blessings to play in the house like a playground.
    I really appreciate that quote. It helps me to remember what is truly important in life.

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    1. I can't live in the future only and ignore the present. I can't concentrate on what is going to happen "some day" and neglect what is happening all around me THIS day. We are charged with making good use of our time on Earth. Let's not forget that.

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  21. I agree with this. I spent too much time on wanting my house to look perfect, and lost sight of what I was losing. I lost big chunks of my children's lives growing up. I recommend picking a day to clean house once a week, or a few minutes a day. Just don't let those precious moments slip away. You'll regret it!

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  22. Keep up the faith Michelle. You guys are a wonderful example to your children.The Lord will honor you as you honor him. God is so good!!!!! It's so hard bringing up children in this fallen world. Love you guys!!!

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    1. Fallen world? How does that sort of thinking help anything or anyone? It's like the door is shut, the fate is sealed, and you've given up on humanity. The world is not fallen! Look around! Get out and connect with people! The good is definitely there, it's just not making all the headlines. It's up to you to find where the good is, and then multiply it...

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    2. So true, 11:45.

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    3. 11:45, you're right. The world IS "fallen," but it's also filled with wonderful people doing their best.

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    4. Frankly, God cares more about our character than our comfort. Since we're going to leave all our "toys" behind when we go to Heaven, we should be focusing our attention on the one thing we can take with us, people. Does that mean we live in chaos and let our children trash the house? Of course not, God is orderly (look around at the complexity and order of Creation) and not the author of confusion. It's about us being in a relationship with Him first and foremost. A benefit of that is being grateful and good stewards of the gifts He's given us (time, talents, things, money, etc.).

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